Never realized the grip it had on me until I tried to go without

You always tell yourself ‘sure, I can quit whenever I want to’

Then you try to stop. Then you start again. Then you realize you were the one being controlled. And then you realize it’s like that toxic relationship where you love somebody who was destroying you. Where you try to stop loving, but something inside you just won’t let go. Like you want to hurt.

It’s been a rough ride. But I can do this. I think?


You definitely can. You’ve admitted this is a problem, so you’ve already begun the steps needed to conquer this.

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How many days sobriety do you have?

Alcohol,35 days

Marijuana, 7

Opioids, 15

Been trying for years

Writing it all down, it looks great. It’s not.

I feel like it should be getting easier by now


Overcoming three substances can take time. You’ve definitely come to a great forum. There’s a lot of great advice on here from members, and I would definitely recommed reading through different threads.

Do you go to any recovery meetings like AA?


I get pretty anxious around others, especially strangers.

That, and I pretty much stay locked in my house when I’m not at work

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Yeah, I understand the anxiety. I get anxious around people as well. I’ve found this forum to be really helpful, and the people here are helpful as well. The forum has a good environment.
Definitely reach out to the people for solidarity, tips, etc. or even just read through the threads. Reading everyone’s stories has been helping me.
Anyway, congratulations on your sobriety. I know the numbers don’t seem high, but they’ll get there.

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Someone once said to me “You’re stronger than this, you are conquering it”, the it is alcohol. I told her nope, I’ll never conquer it. I’m an alcoholic, all it takes is 1 to be back in it’s grip. To me there is no summit, no top of the mountain, this life is all about the continual ascent.


Many people have done it and are doing It!

Thanks for sharing this. I’ll remember this.

It sure looks impressive to me! This is a tough time, but you’re a total rock star for taking care of yourself this way. If the weather is nice, try a short walk; the feel of outdoors and walking helps your neurotransmitters rebuild and will speed things along.

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You can do this. Here’s something I never knew before I got sober and clean: life is 1000xs better on this side. I have 510 days and my lowest moment sober is worth fighting through because embracing this liberation from my addictions means I AM connecting to my greatest potential and soaking up life. Try it for yourself self, join us here, fight for it. You deserve it.

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I’m sticking with it this time. It’s going to kill me if I don’t

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Thank you for the kind words and advice. All of y’all. I think this forum could help

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Congratulations on your days of sobriety. Overcoming 3 substances at the same time it’s really tough. I admire your strength. Glad you’re here. The forum is amazing and helped me a lot so far. Wish you well!!!