A full day has passed. I’m feeling weak but optimistic. I’m in my living room surrounded by empty beer cans and bottles of brandy from Saturday night. I’m facing my demons.
Admitting to having a problem with alcohol was a big blow to my pride. I didn’t really start drinking until I was 20, it didn’t really become problematic until about two years ago. I’m 26 years old.
I have to stop before I hurt myself and my loved ones more than I already have. I’m exhausted with the aftermath of partying. The hangovers, the passed out pictures, piecing together the stories, the unexplained injuries, cheating on my boyfriends after convincing myself I’ll “have a couple beers” before I’m a drunken tailspin.
I’m feeling low, self loathing, I’m a disaster waiting to happen if I don’t clean up my mess. My family and my circle of friends all enjoy drinking so I felt that I didn’t have to reckon with any problems because “they’re not perfect either.” I can’t keep drinking or I will unearth deeper hatred for myself. I want to love myself again.
My father is my support system. He has been sober for almost two years. He is so strong, and I look forward to being by his side while he faces his own demons. I look forward to being a safe and reliable friend to my loved ones, I want to stay sober so I can keep them safe. Sober rides home, anything I can offer as a resource.
Your story sounds so familiar to me. I hope you allow others to help you, trying it alone sucks & for most has lousy results. I’m happy u have your dad as a strong supporter! We’re kind of the opposite there. I’m leaning on my son, who just completed a year of sobriety!
I’m at 17 days.
One day @ a time
There are so many people here with many positive ideas.
@Brooke.Ashley Hi, I’m in early recovery too. I’m a little older (45) so should be wiser right ? Wrong ! Its good you have the support of your dad. Hopefully your circle of support will grow with your sobriety. Early days are tough so come here often and you will see we are all here on the same journey just at different stages.
Welcome @Brooke.Ashley
Congratulations on one day sober. I have 75 days today and have made it this far by taking it one day at a time. Every morning I remind myself that I only have to make it 24 hours, because thinking about forever was to hard of a concept for me to grasp. So remember just for today you do not have to drink, it makes the battle for me a little easier.
I also want to make sure you have someone checking in on you because alcohol can be very dangerous to detox off of on your own. I personally had to go into a detox center because I was having seizures. I am not trying to scare you, you just need safe. Also remember your body is going to crave the sugar so juice (my favorite is apple) can help with detox. My prayers are with you and remember luck has nothing to do with it. Stay strong.
Thanks for the warm welcome.
You already made lots of new sober friends in one day! It’s a great place to keep us all from going a bit insane
@marty I noticed, it’s exciting! I’m going to really enjoy this outlet. My boyfriend and his boys are watching football having beers, I insisted they take my last two Rolling Rocks telling them to “get these away from me.” Tasty temptation, my boyfriend is being really supportive. He’s my reason for this clarity. 
@Brooke.Ashley
Great share, very honest and heart felt and mirrors my story as well when I was in my 20’s. unfortunately it took me another 11 years of guilt, shame and wreckage before I had finally had enough and joined AA. Keep reaching out and doing whatever it takes to not drink one day, 1 hour, 5 mins at a time. Stay strong, stay Sober🌹