I talked to a former boss earlier today. She’s 10 yrs and 3 months sober. She is encouraging me to go to AA, but I kind of feel like I can do this without it. Thoughts? I want honest opinions please…
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Some people can quit with out, some could not.
What AA is part community and part structured therapy (for lack of a better word).
Some people go just for the community. Some people for the growth through the 12 steps. Some for both.
I’ve heard, from many people that the 12 steps doesn’t treat alcoholism, rather it treats the human condition. I’ve also heard many people say that anyone can benefit from the 12 steps, not just alcoholics. I tend to agree with those statements.
The greatest thing about AA is that the only requirement is the desire to quit drinking. You can go for free, and come and go as you please. There’s no commitment nor do you need to participate. Meeting are held practically everywhere and practically all hours of the day.
I think AA is a great resource, even if you don’t need it, I would encourage anyone to attend a meeting.
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I did a couple live and some online meetings. It was super churchy. Don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot to take from the meetings, but every other thing was a prayer or a testimony of some kind.
Also it’s geared toward more severe cases of alcoholism and rebuilding your life. Harder to relate if everyone else’s story involves rehab and being homeless and yours didn’t.
It’s good to have social support. I’m happy AA exists. I subscribe to their podcasts. I’d prefer something more toned down though.
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Yeah I went to the atheist meeting. They were old men twice my age and one literally asked if I knew where I was… Didn’t feel comfortable.
And yes, I know the steps are adaptable, but when a share goes into a ten minute sermon about coming to Jesus I don’t really feel a part of it. This is mostly the online meetings.
Guess I’m being defeatist, I just feel like an imposter when surrounded by people that had such bad issues happen.
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AA isn’t required to get sober, but it’s a very smart choice. Others have talked about why, so I’ll leave that part.
I didn’t get very far before I tried AA. See, the problem with doing it on your own is that you always agree with yourself. Alone, if you turn out to be wrong about something, you tend to stay that way until it hurts. You don’t know what you don’t know, which in recovery is risky business. But you don’t have to do it alone.
But I will say this. Everyone’s got opinions on AA. They vary all over the place. Some will tell you it’s terrible and others will tell you it’s awesome. I would recommend going to a few to see for yourself. It’s the only way to know how you will feel about it. If the first meeting isn’t your thing, try a couple others, each is different. It took me a few to find one I was comfortable with.
If you decide not to go with AA, then please do at least find people who have been sober for a good length of time and follow their recommendations. Everyone else is just guessing at this.
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The way I see it is that the worst thing that could happen by going to AA is that you feel a little bit better inside and make a few friends.
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In my experience I only went to an AA meeting once, I found the meeting was not for me, but everyone is different. I found that everyone telling there story about past experiences quite negative. But still everyone is different. I would give it a try and see what you think. Instead I choose to see a therapist who is experienced in alcohol addiction and a psychologist. See how you go with AA though as it might work for you. Godspeed to you 
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You have nothing to lose… so why not?
The AA room is the only room i have walked in to after a relapse and felt zero judgement. It is all about encouragement, and also the tough truth about peoples experiences with alcohol.
I went through the doors 4 years ago scared as hell and only because i didnt know what else to do. I reached out to a friend of mine who i knew had stopped drinking many years prior with the help of AA.
The problem was, even though i thought i was ready, i really wasn’t ready to admit i had a “real” problem and found every excuse to dismiss the program. I tried doing it my way because i knew better way - wrong! My drinking got worse and i bounced in and out for a long time.
I am back in the program with a new egoless approach and things are progressing well. I understand the comments on preachy sermons and even though i have no issue with the God concept myself, i understand the issue some have with it. I sometimes dont necessarily like how or what people say in the stories, but if i put personalities aside, there is most times a word or line of wisdom there.
The problem with AA for me…was me. Now that i realize that, i am having much greater sucess. I actually apologized to AA in a meeting this week because i realized that my alcoholic mind had previously used my attendance at the AA meetings to manipulate both me and the people close to me into believing i was working on my problem…but really i wasnt.
I am happy to have AA in my life and with my ego shelved…i am now making real progress.
Good luck…I hope you find a way to stay sober with or without AA…thats the main thing 
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I don’t need to get in to all the wishy-washy stuff. I’ll give you could facts. Before AA I could not keep the drink and the drugs down. My life was horrible. Since AA I haven’t had a drink or a drug in almost 2 years. My life is amazing beyond my wildest dreams today. AA works, and it works well. And it works for everyone. I know plenty of people who are athiest, who had really high bottoms, who weren’t even alcoholic, and they all went to AA got and, more importantly, stayed sober. Some people go to a few meetings and think have it all figured out. I’ve probably been to 800 meetings or more and I learn something new every time I go.
Stick with the winners.
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Well said.
@Startingover916, whatever you take from this thread, if you decide to go I would suggest that you do 2 things.
Go with an open mind, don’t let any pre-concieved ideas get in the way.
And leave your ego at home.
Yes there are guys that hit rock bottom, lost everything. Which I didn’t, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t connect with them. Just because that experience didn’t happen to me.
I connect with them because we each have the same addiction to alcohol. We each have no control over alcohol and have accepted this and are using the rooms to help deal with recovery.
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Hi Kimberly…
I don’t go to AA and I’m doing really well with my tools at hand at this point.
But I do know AA and NA literally saved one of my son’s life. He’d been Narcan-ed more times than even he can count. But he’s got over 2 years clean and sober, and now has 2 sponsees of his own. I am eternally grateful to The Rooms for saving his life when nothing else seemed to be able to. 
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This is not my experience at all, and I have been to several hundred meetings. It is unusual for me to hear anything referring to a specific religion. And I have never been to rehab or detaox, never been homeless or had an OUI. I had a high flying professional career at which I was successful and owned multiple properties. This doesn’t make me any better than a person who went to rehab or jail, alcoholism affects all of us. For me, it destroyed my mental health, dignity and self respect. But AA has helped me start to gain those things back.
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AA is the only thing that saved my ass. I have read dozens of self help books and done other programs and all were fruitless.
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I might try an AA meeting tonight since it’s Friday. Weekends are my down fall. Although with my therapist to answer to the temptation isn’t there. We’ll see when 5pm hits.
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A great, supportive, caring community, where everyone knows one thing about each other - we are all powerless over alcohol, and need to give up the crazy, vain notion that at the 50th, 100th, 1000th attempt we can beat it.
Just great to be in a roomwhere EVERYONE recognizes that and we can take things from there.
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The best thing Ive ever did was complete my 90 meetings in 90 days. It put me on a path that has given me 180 straight days of sobreity. The longest period since I was 13. AA doesnt teach you how to quit drinking. It teaches you how to live sober. Give it a go and keep going. You will not regret it. Good luck and God bless.
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I’ve been sober almost 3 years And then two mini mini AA meetings. Only one meeting has ended in the Lords prayer. I think it depends on what the culture is in your community in your city at your AA meetings. Keep trying a variety of meetings because they really do have their own dynamic. Please don’t judge one meeting and think that all meetings are like that.
Edit: I meant to write to the original poster! Sorry!
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I can see how it could differ depending on the location. I went to some aa meetings after my first week sober. I was nervous but, everyone there was super nice to me and there wasn’t much of a religious tone maybe one prayer. It felt good to be amongst others that went or were going through the same struggles that I was.
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The meetings I attend end with the ‘we’ version of the serenity prayer - although I have been to one athiest/agnostic meeting that simply ended with ten minutes of silent meditation.
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maybe if you try a meeting you might end up like your boss long time sober , for me AA was my savior but if you think you can do it different then i wish you well ,ps the only people i know who are long time sober go to AA ,
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