Yes please 
1 Like
Hey Caroline, thanks for sharing! 
Hadn’t heard from you on the forum for a while (maybe I just missed it). Good to read you’re still around! 
1 Like
I’m still around, just needed to step away and recharge a bit
Thank you for reaching out
1 Like
Hey Moxie.
Hope you don’t mind me crashing in here for a bit.
I just came across this and thought I’d leave it here for others to read if they are interested.
Have a nice weekend.
3 Likes
I love it when you stop by. 
Thanks for sharing this. It’s a great article.
You have a nice weekend, too. I hope you get some pretty Spring weather. 
2 Likes
BOREDOM IN SOBRIETY
Most people don’t realize how much of life’s time is consumed by alcohol, drugs, and other addictions. The mental obsession with our addictions takes up a lot of brain space, and once we’re sober, we have so much extra time on our hands that we’re at a loss for what to do with it. If we’re distancing ourselves from people or situations that bring our addiction to mind, then our social activity is lessened as well. All of this can lead to boredom, and boredom allows the mind to wander, it allows intrusive thoughts, and until we get it under control, boredom is a huge trigger in early sobriety.
Being in active addiction, we oftentimes move away from healthy habits. We numb our emotions and lose sight of the things we once enjoyed. When we first quit, our brains are underwhelmed by nearly everything, because for years we’ve been overwhelming our dopamine system. It takes work to dig ourselves out of this mindset, but finding new interests and relearning healthy habits will get us there. Some of the things I’m doing are river walks, meditation, reading, making my own laundry detergent, hand soap, and other household items, beginning a consistent yoga practice, baking and cooking new recipes, being outdoors more, and staying in touch with family and friends more. Eating crunchy veggies and fruit, especially chilled apples, helps me a lot with anxiety and urges to drink.
I think the main key to overcoming and avoiding boredom is reaching a state of mindfulness. (I’m adding a link below for beginner exercises.) That sounds simple, but it takes a lot of practice to get there. And that practice helps take some of the extra time off our hands and use it in a healing way. Examining and understanding our thoughts, and focusing and calming our minds, go a long way towards dealing with boredom. Recovery is about so much more than abstaining from our addictions, it’s also about learning how to live without them. We have to identify interests and activities that will help keep our minds and bodies active and growing throughout our lives. When we do the work, we can overcome boredom in sobriety.
5 Likes
I would add “overthinking” to the list. It’s so easy to get lost in our minds and forget to come up for air, for connection, for awareness. When the overthinking starts, I’m practicing paying attention to my breath, especially the space between breaths. That space, that gone-ness of breath, is a powerful reminder to stay aware.
Much love to y’all who suffer from depression. We’re going to be ok. 
6 Likes
When we’re in active addiction, we not only lose sight of things we once enjoyed, we may accept harmful treatment from those close to us that we would never put up with if we were sober.
We either relearn who we were before addiction took over our life, or we get to know ourselves in a way we never did before. It’s common to realize that relationships formed in active addiction don’t make any sense to us now. For sobriety’s sake, and for our own well-being, we have to let those go.
Letting go is easier said than done, because this is life and life gets messy. We’re human. We crave familiarity, even when it hurts us. We form attachments, but if those attachments are detrimental to our sobriety and to our peace of mind, we need to let them go. It’s important to make space for the good stuff. So believe in yourself and have faith that you’re doing what’s best for you.
3 Likes
Here are some of the books I’ve been reading since becoming sober. I’ve loaned a few others to the boys, so I’ll post those later. 
You may have to tap on the photo to get a clearer image for reading the small print.
5 Likes
I’ve only read Atlas of the heart and How to do the work from that group. My next book was going to be Happy Days.
But I feel like The Body Keeps Score keeps popping up, so maybe I should listen to the signs.
What did you think about it?
Is there another from that group that was really impactful? Or all of them, just in different ways.
P.s I love you
2 Likes
I have to say the most impactful is a toss-up between How to do the Work and The Body Keeps the Score. I gained a lot from all of them, especially Atlas of the Heart, but for the nitty gritty, behind the scenes of how our minds work, I took the most from the two above.
There’s an interesting story behind When Things Fall Apart. When my son was attending DU, his job was within walking distance of the dorm, so he usually walked or rode his bike. One day, heading home from work, he came to a crossroads in a neighborhood, and this book was laying there in the center of the streets. He picked it up, looked for a name or address, and not seeing one, he took it home. After reading it, he gave it to me. He said he thought it was a sign, because this book was something he really needed to read at that time in his life. I love serendipity.
I’ve seen the Happy Days book. It’ll be next on the list.
P.S. I love you, too.
2 Likes
Which of these reasons strikes a chord with you?
For me, it’s the second one. New behaviors need a lot of daily repetition to feel normal and unforced. One new behavior for me has been living my life alcohol-free. The longer I continue sobriety, the easier it gets, the less I think about alcohol as something I need to have fun, to help anxiety, and to cope with depression and the not-so-great emotions. Over the past 8 months sobriety is becoming a normal behavior. I’ve needed these continuous and repetitive alcohol-free days to let my brain create new neural pathways that allow for managing my life with healthier habits. Change is hard, especially in the beginning. But when we stick with it, we can make changes in our lives for the better.
5 Likes
For me limiting core beliefs.
Unpacking, learning, sitting with, journaling, and discovering more about myself every day.
2 Likes
4 Likes
I’m glad you’re doing this, because you are lovable and worthy. 
2 Likes
Thank you so much for sharing this. I will make time tomorrow to listen. 
1 Like
You’re so very Welcome; the video 180’d understanding of my addiction to cannabis & alcohol. My sober date is 3/5/22.
1 Like
Congratulations on your days! 
Getting beyond those first few weeks is awesome.
The first video I watched at the beginning of sobriety was of William Porter, explaining the physiological effects of alcohol. That video led me to several books about quitting, and here I am, 8 months sober tomorrow. It’s helping me tremendously to learn the behind-the-scenes affects of alcoholism on my brain, my thoughts, and my behaviors… and how to grow now that I’m alcohol-free.
2 Likes
Call congrats as well; statistics show relapse usually happens between 45-90 days. I will not meet that statistic and beyond; my Life fe depends on it!
1 Like
Since becoming sober, I am learning to respect myself in new ways. I’m choosing to surround myself with positive and supportive people, here and in my daily life. I’m working on honoring my emotions and learning my strengths and weaknesses. And even though I long to have a relationship with my mom like the one my sister has with her, I’ve never had an issue with comparing myself to others. That’s one less thing I have to work on… thankfully. 
5 Likes