Personal check in thread

I can forgive myself for smoking the joint i bought, but I need to write about why and see what to do next.

I am feeling very lost, too lost to have a huge chunk of sobriety to have the pressure to protect. I want the milestones of 30 60 90 days again.

But I dont want to lie to myself into a real trap. I feel very internally serious about not using until september, if ever. Its not what I need or want. I will post here instead of smoking if I want to do that.

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Im not drinking or smoking today. Im making popcorn and being with my anger. I wish i was crossfaded watching a dumb tv show.

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Im not using today. I guess its raining. Maybe ill try to bake something. Im so sad. I could use but i wont.

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