I took a little extra of my prescribed meds today
Ill tell my dr what and why and how
I feel gulty but i dont call it a relaps
Sept 12th 2024 is my day and its stayin
I took extra god damn gabapentine
Im getting off it now
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I had terrible dreams lastnight about picking up gient weed roaches off the ground in a city area then put them in a stash box and smoked them with my sister and childhood best friend
The trama is deeper then the laps
I do not call this a reset
Perhaps you needed it at the time? It doesn’t sound much like a relapse, but I don’t know your history, either. I take gabapentin for restless legs syndrome. If it wasn’t doing it’s job, Is be tempted to take extra, too.
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Thats a tough situation friend. Im glad u will be speaking to your Dr about it. I guess it comes down to WHY u decided to take extra of ur med? What were you trying to accomplish by doing so? If ur feeling guilty, to me, thats a sign that u feel like uv done something wrong. Idk… it would be awful to have to reset, i get that for sure. Only u can decide if its a slip or not. Hope that taking extra of ur med hasnt triggered anything for u.
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I am sorry friend. Glad you are aware that this could have underlying concerns and are vigilant about it. Glad you are talking to your doctor.
Hopefully you will find out what the cause was that had you take extra meds. Did they not do the job right, were you hoping to get something more out of them? Only questions you can answer.
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Hounest to god you guys are smart. I was expecting more like gossip or shunn.
Guys today sucked
I had to take the day off work. Its 10:24pm at night and ive been askeep sence 3pm in the afternoon
I had strange dreams again
In my dreams
1st
I was walking around at night on my childhood road looking for my buddies while i was thinking people wamted to end me. I was walking around with sharpened sticks and i told this person who was outside my buddies house that these people who wanted to end me wanted me d**d because “i thretend their reality”
2nd
Then i was in my childhood room going to buy a 12pack of coors light. I left to go for the walk and saw this friend who had a spiritual mesning in my life as i connected him with my spirit animal which is a crow. He passed after that from complications with his health in 2019 as a young young adult. He was a wicken and he never mentioned anything about a spirt animal to me . And earlier this year i found out my spirit animal attached to my birthdate is a crow.
3rd
I was at the mall leaving notes. The notes said "im 2 years sober with mental health, i want a drink, is it worth it?
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.ok earlier today at around 10am in the morning i had another tiff addict attack. I wanted a cigar to help ease me. My wife said no and i hounestly wigged but i listened but yes i was trying to convince her.
We were getting gas and i actually got out and asked to go get a cigar and told her if i could id forget about it all and our tiff would be over, she god damn said no and got in the car. I argued but got back in the car. I argued till we got to a fast food place. She went in.
I called a buddy from AA
I broke the fk down sobbing and yelling how i need to be heard and no1 is giving me a inch. The man from AA just listened. He asked if therecwas a dangor and i told him no. I talked to him a little then said i had to go. Then i called him back and said im mad but not a dangor but dont want to be tempted so i asked him if it would be weird if i volunteerely just sat at the police office to cool down. He said it would be odd but if it would help why not. Then i told him id go for a long walk insted.
Then
I talked to my wife and got her to let me walk to get a drink. It would take about 15min. It would be a 15min walk to get a drink. She said yes.
I walked past a liquor store nd it dawned on me what i could do. And i did exactly that
I walked in and bought a $1.25 nip of jim beam and dumped it out and threw away a nip bottle, and i bought some cold water at a grocery store across the lot. i dont even remember what happened to the cold water. Then all day i was exhausted and miserable. I fell asleep 8hours ago and woke up 1hour ago
Why do you call your slip as a relapse in your topic, but not in the post? Confusing. If it would be me, I’d call it a relapse and I’d reset my timer. But only you can make that decision, but don’t fool yourself with reasons and excuses.
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Thank you sir. I will fix my topic. I came to terms with myself and dont call it a relaps because i was using a little extra meds as a tool to get me to work and to get rid of anxiety