Problem between abstinence vs harm reduction

I was talking with a fellow alcoholic today who asked me if I was hanging in there. I said yes and that I’ve been sober, for the most part, for 6 weeks. He said, then you haven’t been sober for six weeks. Here’s the thing: I know that. At the same time, I was drinking every day and over the last 50 plus days have drank 5 times. That’s a reduction of 90% and I’m going to take it as a win. Right now I’m without alcohol for 4 days with a commitment to living a healthy life without drinking. All is not lost because I’ve slipped.

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Sometimes brutal honesty from strangers or outside perspectives can be the hammer hitting the nail on the head for us. My sponser had to tell me I had to give everything up for complete sobriety in order to keep a relationship with him. I hadn’t had a drink in a couple weeks but was still smoking pot from dawn till dusk, justifying it. But once he said that and had to hang up I took a look at myself mentally and that was the last day I used anything to numb out. We’ve since had a great relationship and talk once a week. You can do it too. This online forum is amazing and the people on it have helped me reach 40 days today and will keep it up!

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I think everyone has their own opinions BUT if you drank on a regular black out DRUNK and could not control stopping–and “slipped” and managed to stop yourself throw it away pour it out make a negative a positive, that is great!! Positive reinsurance goes a long way with recovery.
Keep up the good work!!

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Only you know what kind of relationship you have with sobriety and how that feels for you. I don’t believe there is only a one size fits all solution to problem drinking. And words are just words. Only you know if you are being honest with yourself and your process. If you feel positive and hopeful about where you are at, that is all that matters. Keep moving forward and congrats on changing your life.

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