Tonight I had a weird experience. So I live at a sober living house but I’m at the transition apartments across the street. A guy a few apartments down from me was acting different tonight. He was being loud, aggressive, talking to himself and keep repeating himself and bothering me. My gut was telling me he was drinking but I didn’t know for sure till I saw him 30 minutes ago leave on his bike with a book bag to go to a store that is far away. I knew the only reason he was going to this store was so that nobody would see him buying alcohol or drugs. I went back inside and thought about what to do then I knew I had to go across the street and talk to management. I told them I was worried this would come back on me and there would be violence but they found a reason to go over to his apartment a little bit ago and he admitted he was drinking. I know I did the right thing but part of me feels bad. Maybe it’s because of my own previous relapses it has me thinking. This addiction thing is serious and it’s out to get us if we are not working every single day on a program to do better in life. I hope he gets some sleep tonight and finds somewhere safe to go tomorrow but he can’t stay here. This is a sober living community for people who want to be sober. If he wants to drink or do drugs there is plenty of hotels and trap houses he can go but if he wants recovery there is options to start over. Where I live in a 5 mile radius there is many sober livings, detoxes, and places for help. I pray for him and hope he makes the right decision tomorrow. This situation definitely has me kind of wired right now and feeling weird. What a night. Unfortunately not everybody is here for the right reason. Life lessons always
Your gut definitely knows. You been there.
You definitely did the right thing.
You are protecting your sobriety at all cost. You do not need that kind of influence around you. I’m sure it was hard to get up the nerve and “tell.” But like you said. It’s sober living. You definitely didn’t do anything wrong. Sorry you had to go through that. Glad you could journal it here.
I think you did him a favour too… If or when he comes back to sober living, he’ll be able to trust that it IS sober living. Who knows? Maybe one day he’ll be in tge position you were in tonight and do what you did to protect his sober home. 
When I first had suspicion I came back inside to my apartment and I couldn’t focus on anything and it was really bothering me not because I had cravings but because I was worried about him. It was definitely hard to say something. They have a strict policy here about using and drinking and you have to leave if you fail a test or admit using or drinking. I understand letting him sleep it off for tomorrow he needs to find another option. I’m going to talk to him tomorrow morning and see if he wants to go to detox before it gets bad. Because it’s going to get bad. There is a medical detox about 1 mile away I’ll even walk him there. But I can’t make him do anything it’s up to him. Maybe he needs some more pain. I hope not. But this event definitely has me feeling Bothered and I’m trying to understand why. I also called my sponsor. And my mom. I guess I’m just mad because I don’t wanna see anybody go back out. Because I know where it leads
I never thought about that that if he comes back to a sober living maybe he’ll take it more seriously and if I say nothing maybe he thinks he can get away with it and doesn’t learn. Thanks for reaching out. I’m going to reflect on this and learn
I’m definitely not going to knock on his door tonight but I’m definitely going to go outside every once in a while and make sure he’s not acting crazy or doing anything harmful. I hope he doesn’t go overboard because he knows he messed up and doesn’t care. I will not hesitate to call somebody over here if I have to. Hopefully it doesn’t come to that and he goes to sleep
I’ve known alot of people in sober living. I currently work with 4 guys from the same halfway house. Every single story I’ve heard like this ends the same way. The ones who are taking it seriously turn in the ones who are not, for the greater good of the house. You did the right thing 
Thank you. I guess it is like that. I just never understood drinking and using at a sober living house. It’s like if you’re going to do that why would you want to be around sober people. Maybe they think they can get away with it. But that’s the thing throughout my addiction with alcohol and many drugs I had a lot of yets. Well this hasn’t happened yet or that hasn’t happened yet till it did. And if I kept playing with fire I’m sure there would come a time in my life where I would’ve done the same thing As far as using or drinking in one of these places. The bar always gets lower with every relapse. I’m so grateful it’s not me having to start over tomorrow morning feeling like shit. I’m sorry to say that but it’s the truth. That could just as easily be me if I stop taking my recovery seriously
I see this as a very good thing you did. I remember for a couple years after I got sober I still identified w the alkies on the corner on my neighbourhood. They sit there year in year out pissing their lives and health and options away. I felt like that before, when I was so unprepared and scared of life. (I’m still scared btw) I identified w the ppl who are using and on the street.
Then something shifted in me maybe three or four years in, I identified no longer w the users, but if anything w the ppl in recovery. Who had used but turned their lives around. I’m not saying I don’t have sympathy or can’t understand, by God I understand why ppl drink. But this feeling myself one of them has changed, I see myself as so firmly away from that life. And when I read your story I also get the impression that you also are placing yourself firmly in opposition to his choices. which can only be a good thing. And it doesn’t mean you wouldn’t also stretch out a hand or be sympathetic, it just means marking a difference in your actions.
All the best Trev it’s so great to see you well on your way! I’m always rooting for you!
You did the right thing. Like you say it’s a sober living community.
You have helped the entire community and also probably helped that person as well
I used to work at a sober house and it was annoying when people would drink and try to hide it. Ultimately there are queues and a huge backlog of people waiting to get in and when people drink and try to hide it all they’re doing is bed-blocking for others who would accept the room and the help and use it in a positive way.
Look what could have happened if nothing was said to the guy drinking. Other sober persons living in the apt. would have been threatened by his drinking, maybe 1 or 2 join him? The safety of the community becomes shattered, and sobriety loses its priority. 1 or 2 residents may get jealous, “well if he can drink and get away with it” and they plan to have their own relapse.
Halfway houses and sober living homes have to enforce the rule that anyone who relapses cannot remain on or in the premises. They will be offered help to detox or another program. If they resume their abstinence, they can later rejoin their program.
Like Badger said, someone drinking that remains in sober housing is a threat to that entire program.
Thanks so much I totally here what your saying. I definitely can feel for him and understand to a certain degree but also at the same time I can’t anymore because my thinking has changed. It probably effected me last night more then it should have but it was for good reasons. I still don’t even know if I made the right choice posting about this but then again that’s doing something new for my recovery that maybe I wouldn’t have done in the past or got off my chest.
Thank you . I now feel I did the right thing for the community for sure and I hope he sees it needed to be done and he learns and doesn’t have to go on a binge just because of this he can turn this around if he chooses. And yes exactly he’s taking up a spot of somebody who may be actually wants this
I agree though this didn’t cause me to think about drinking or doing drugs or even consider it that doesn’t mean it would influence somebody else possibly. This is supposed to be a safe place. He definitely has options of places to go. That’s up to him
I want to say thank you to everybody who reached out. I really appreciate it. I was definitely affected by this last night I think mainly because it makes me think about my previous choices and this keeps me scared and desperate to never have to go back to day one. They’re giving him till Sunday to find somewhere to go. Which is unusual. If he’s caught drinking again he has to leave right away. I think he’s pretty upset and that’s understandable but he has the ability to turn this around If he wants to. But this also affects the house because he is one of the cooks. This doesn’t affect me because I’m fortunate to have a decent job and I can afford to eat out or cook because I have my own place across the street but there is people that are new so I guess they’re going to have to find somebody temporarily to cook over there for the weekends. I guess one of the lessons I’m learning or realizing is that I’m at a sober living house and part of this community because I have crossed that line and can’t drink or drug Successfully. There is a reason I’m here and I can’t forget. I have to stay vigilant and work hard every day. I can’t let my guard down. Also i have to reach out Or get into action before the relapse. The relapse doesn’t have to happen. Thank you for allowing me to speak freely. Thank you to this community
Bottom line is you protected your sobriety.
I turned my roommate in for smoking crack when I was in sober living. He got kicked out. Maybe it helped him get sober the next time or maybe he overdosed and died. I can’t take responsibility for either thing happening. His actions are his responsibility and my sobriety is mine.
There’s no need to justify your actions. Your sobriety has got to come first and that’s exactly what you did
That’s a good point I’m not responsible for whatever comes next in his life. That’s up to him. I did what I had to do. Thank you