So… I’ve just been away camping and I’ve been really on edge and grumpy. I think it’s been the fact that I’ve seen other blokes relaxing outside their tents drinking lager in the evening (this is what I used to do) I’ve been jealous and romanticising drinking again. I’ve taken this out on my family having a really low tolerance and been short tempered.
I think I need to do an online meeting this evening and get better spiritually. I’ve not been good at this as I’ve always struggled with ‘connecting with my higher power’ and ‘reaching out to other alcoholics’
I’m a stereotypical male who isn’t a “ringer” and I don’t like talking about my emotions. So here it goes I admit I’m struggling a bit recently…
I’m worried this is the start of a slippery slope, I haven’t had this in this period of sobriety and wonder if it’s because I haven’t been getting to live meetings as during Zoom my mind does wonder, A LOT…
A meeting sounds like a really good idea. I’ve been putting my feelings out there for the past couple of decades and it feels good. I even put on a good healing emotional song with my ear buds on my walk and cry. Letting those feeling out somewhere else seems to work good for me. Better than taking it out on other people. And as far as romanticizing about having a lager, or in my case a really nice glass of wine, Just one? Seriously just one? I know it never never never ever stops at just one. I have no days to count when I had just one.
I’m still fanticizing about having a really nice expensive bottle of wine some day. I hate it. I wish someone would tell me why. But I also don’t have the urge to drink today. And probably not tomorrow either.
Stick around here and get your meeting on. Keep asking questions and sharing. You certainly aren’t alone brother.
Chin up Buddy maybe give your sponsor a phone , just a blip you have got the tools you got at meetings and the program to use when these thought come youl be ok keep on trucking venturing into England this week hopefully they will take my scottish pound notes lol
Hey Darren I struggled myself thru cov19,and like you I get angry and resentful which for me is a really unsafe place to be mentally emotionally and physically,I ending up picking up BC I didn’t have nowhere to put that anger and resentments and over a period of time it really does break you down, I’d say get to a meeting or zoom , personally for me I didn’t take to zoom in really lucky to have my in-person meeting back on,nice one for reaching out this shows your willing to show emotions and whatever it takes to keep your soberity
Hey Darren…sorry to hear that you’re struggling though…you are able to recognize that you are and come on here to talk about it instead. It sounds like “not being good at talking about your emotions” is an outdated expectation you have of yourself. You have changed…that’s huge! I think you have a sponsor right? Maybe you could schedule a few weeks of regular time to meet with him so that you have something sober to ground yourself in. Going to meetings, making a gratitude list, reading some sobriety material, even setting an alarm for the parts of your day when you usually find resentments creeping in that tells you to come on here to read or partake in an activity that you enjoy could all be ways to help you through? Always happy to be here on this sober journey with you
Well done on stepping up mate. It’s true when they say we can start to get complacent in our journey.
Especially once we get the year up.
Thanks for sharing Daz and yes I’d suggest you maybe pick up the game a little.
Nice one buddy!
Well done for recognizing your struggle and coming on here to talk about it. I feel the same way you do when I cut back on meetings. I say, jump on a zoom meeting and share what you’re feeling. Maybe just getting it out will help some.
