I used to do a Daily Expenses and Income spreadsheet that I painstakingly spent so much time and effort making and I would fill it out diligently and my finances were in pretty good shape. But then I stopped because of work and travel and self-soothing with alcohol. And then today as I’m looking at my bank account, I’m realizing oh shit—during these past two months, I’ve been spending way above my means. Before this I had enough money to buy a new MacBook, take a vacation, cover my expenses for the next few months, while STILL growing my savings. Now my savings are wiped out and I only have enough money to cover my basic expenses. I spent almost 200% of what I was bringing in.
I’m so pissed off! All that budgeting and planning gone to waste! On drinking, takeout, and eating out because I was too hungover and depressed to take proper care of myself!? In the middle of this inflation? Ugh I feel so stupid.
I can barely muster the courage to look at my incomplete Daily Expenses and Income Report. It seems like such a huge reflection of my failure
I just had to rant about this. I’m so tired of this fiscal irresponsibility because it’s a trap. I spend money to stress out about money so I drink and spend more money to take care of my hungover and depressed self. Alcohol is truly poison
I keep telling myself that I’m still young, I still have time, my star is rising, I’m not even 30 yet, and so many of my peers are in the same boat as me. But all of this time and money I’ve wasted on drinking. The grief of so many lost possibilities during this past decade. I could be so much more stable than I am right now. And if I was going to spend that money, I could have spent it on things I actually enjoy, like books or videos games or nice furniture or good quality clothing or becoming a better cook. I am never picking up another bottle again.
Remember this feeling. This post right here
When your brain starts to try and trick you into the fun drinking times remember how much it took from you.
You are totally right, you are still young, still so much ahead, and without alcohol you will have control again in no time. The only way is forward now. It’s pointless to beat yourself up about it now, just remember it and learn from it and start anew
I hear ya, when I got sober again and took a hard look at what I wanted, where I wanted to be, and took action with my finances, I was able to make the moves needed to see a mortgage broker, get a second loan, and move into a better home while keeping an investment property.
It took getting sober to get off my ass and do what I wanted to do for a long time. I was annoyed for a while that I didn’t do it sooner, but I did it. And this solid year has been more productive then the five behind it.
Imagine what we can do without the limits of booze in the next year? Decade? It’s an exciting feeling.
Just reading about how you persevered and succeeded gets me excited. Time to set some goals in writing and make amends with my finances. Also I’m gonna keep this rant somewhere visible in my room so I can look at it whenever I’m tempted.
Totally relate to this! I’ve got myself into a real financial hole and it’s shit. I had financial difficulties in my late twenties, married, with 1 child (not alcohol related). Took years to get back on track. Now I’m a single parent to 2 and am back in the same position - this time all because of mismanaging due to my heavy drinking. It’s gonna take a long time to get things straight… BUT, I know I can! However, only if I keep a clear and sober head!! You can totally do this x
A long time ago I did inpatient treatment and they had us do an exercise. Make the best estimate of how much you have spent on your DOC. I came up with over $40,000.
And that was 6 years ago. It’s a mistake I keep making. But we can’t change the past, so let’s just keep moving forward.
I’m gonna tell you, a month later, I feel a lot better about my finances. I mean yea I still wish I had that money I spent on bullshit but I’m ok now. And I think you will be too if you can sit down and look at the tools you have to help get you through this rut.
@liminal.rehab After I got sober, I noticed my bank account was not being overdrawn anymore. When I started noticing that it was building, I began making purchases because I was finally happy to have some spending money. I never got into trouble financially, but I realized that I had the unhealthy mindset of having a bigger income and I could buy what I wanted.
I figured out my budget and moved every dime that I didn’t need per month into a savings account. Now when I think about using some savings for a medical/dental bill, I feel like a scrooge and do not want to see my balance reduced.
I sometimes feel this but I actually do need to think about saving money because as a freelancer my income comes in floods and droughts. However, I’m getting to a point in my career where I’m recognized as a professional and my income is stabilizing and growing as a result. After 5 years of almost no income, I’m finally seeing some payback from my investments. But now working on the scarcity mindset I developed for survival during my struggling artist years. Realizing I don’t need to sit on every single buck that comes my way because more money will come to me. Thanks for sharing!
Im seeing this so late maybe that’s a good thing idk lol ir divine timing but thank you for the encouragement !! I’m gonna be alright it’s taken some time but I’m getting there one day at a time!
I’m gonna be alright it’s taken some time but I’m getting there one day at a time!