Hey folks! I was sober for quite a long time. I cant tell you how long because i didnt count. But ive recently fallen off the wagon and am trying tonget back on. My problem, as a lot of people share, is that i suffer from crippling anxiety and have a really hard time getting out of the house when in this state. Id like to try meetings again and stuff but i find myself in such a heightened state of anxiety i can barely get out of the house. Because of the job i hold i cant keep playing this game im playing of âid go to the office but _____â. Any suggestions on how others were able to get out of this cycle and seek help would be appreciated. Should i seek therapy and counseling? AA meetings? Idk, i feel like im going to have to load up on meds just to get out. I feel really weak right now and the thought of going anywhere terrifies me. Should i ask family to accompany me? Idk, looking for suggestions.
Hi,
I can totally relate to the anxiety of going out, sharing your âstuffâ, etc. I think baby steps is the key here. I definitely recommend therapy, a big plus if they have experience with addiction. Luckily i was able to find a therapist who almost exclusively does virtual appointments. An internet directory like zocdoc can help you find a provider in your area who takes your insurance, etc. Also yes i think meetings are a great idea. There is actually a whole directory of zoom/online/phone AA meetings. All different timezones (and even 24 hour ones where someone is always in the zoom room, these could be good to get up the nerve to talk to people). Usually these meetings only require you to turn your camera on to introduce your name and sober time and then you can turn it back off and just be a fly on the wall. However, if you cannot deal with ANY human interaction whatsoever (and sometimes we have one of those days or weeks) i recommend books about sobriety, specifically workbooks. Turning inward can help if it is anxiety inducing to talk outward. Also this place is a great resource! Lastly, what has helped me is incentives. I am not in a traditional aa/sober program so i ended up buying the chips for myself. Got a jar on etsy, went to the online token shop where you can get all the coins for like 55c each. Its a little something you can do to mark milestones. Every âspecialâ milestone, 1, 3, 6 month, etc, i will buy myself a fancy, custom token from etsy with fun designs on it. Sometimes shiny things help and thats ok. Shaking the jar every one in a while and hearing how far you have come is a pick me up when you need it. I think taking these things and gradually building up your confidence to go back to the âreal worldâ is an option but if you only do these virtual things that in itself can be enough if it works for you. For me, who is immunocompromised and lives with and takes care of parents who are the same, these are my only option and this week will be the 3 month mark for me. There is NO shame in doing things your way. Hope some of this helps and good luck! 
Forgot to add, meds are a totally valid option because issues around sobriety are very often coupled with mental health issues AND leaning on people in your circle is a MUST, but if you are not there yet, no shame. They dont have to physically go anywhere with you (although when you start going out to meetings, etc they can be there for moral support) but just talking about things (alcohol related and not because if i have learned anything, EVERYTHING can be related to alcohol if its an ingrained enough coping mechanism), talking things through, venting and IMPORTANT- celebrating milestones and progress! One day at a time. <3
Hi Tom ,. I feel for you , Iâve been there too with crippling anxiety 
social phobia the 500 lb phone is real lol.
From my toolbox:
No 1. Check in with people you trust.
- face your fears to reduce your fears, progressive not deep end first.
Completely leave behind all addictions.
Embrace the community (through spiritually, 12step, mental health groups, volunteer - somewhere out of the house to chech in with regularly especially where a mentor or sponsor is found
When the student is ready the teacher will appear,. I so believe this!
Just my 2 cents , take what you like, I wish you well 
Yes I have a great therapist and the company is called SONDERMIND! If you have an employer they might cover the cost by your insurance benefits but I can reach out to her and she can send you an referral invitation. And yes I would also go to an IOP program they are great !!! Lmk here to chat anytime
Online meetings are a good way to get meetings in without leaving the house, and you can ease yourself in. I just listened with camera off for months. Then shared. Then finally put camera on. I still havenât been to a F2F meeting, but have a âhomeâ online one that is an integral part of my program.
Iâll drop a link below for online meetings. I find this particular site is the best for those who just wanna listen and feel it out. You only turn your camera on if you wanna share and itâs a 2 step process so you wonât accidentally turn it on. Access the site/meetings from your phoneâs web browser for the best results. There is an app but it doesnât work well at all.