Towards the end of last year my marriage fell to pieces. Ultimately, it became too much for me and I threw 5 years of sobriety away to cope with it.
I have lost my wife to the very drugs that I once let destroy my entire existence.
So…here I am, 4 days sober…and I’ve never felt so fucking alone than I do right now.
Welcome to the community it’s a great place to become a part of and you will always receive support when you need it.
I’m sorry to hear about the breakdown of your marriage there are many people in here who can relate after losing partners through their own actions woody in active addiction or lost them to the drugs.
Do you have any kind of in person support network at all? What was your drug of choice if you don’t mind me asking? Have you thought of going to some NA meetings, there you will find others who can show you how to live life sober, they will support you, befriend you and though fellowshipping you will have evenings and days out. They would benefit you hugely. 
I kind of lost my support network throughout my marriage. My wife and I were both addicts. Both got sober, I stayed sober, but she couldn’t. Most days were spent trying to be the best version of myself in a hope that it would inspire her to stick to sobriety. My drug of choice is EVERYTHING, although I mostly stick with heroin and alcohol.
Where I live there aren’t much NA meetings, but quite a decent amount of AA Meetings.
Thank you for such a quick response. I am glad I got this app.
Your welcome! I would go to some AA meetings instead then as you will benefit from them and get just as much support as you would at NA. Heroin was one of my main docs so I know the struggle involved there. This place can be very helpful, there are loads of good threads that you can search out using the magnifying glass search function at the top. People who check in daily, become a part of this community and just generally make do use of the forum tend to do well in their sobriety. Looking forward to hearing more from you!
Hi @Shoyu I can tell you now your never alone when you are involved in this community,them first few weeks are Gona fell raw,your open to all the elements as we have chosen not to subdue them with our doc,and yes sitting with ourselves is so painful and uncomfortable,but once you get past that each day ,hour minute, second you don’t pick up you start to grow you start to feel hope ,you start to think that maybe just maybe you no longer have to live this horrible existence we call our lives ,I promise you put the work in BC I don’t want to seen to the point but I’m going to be,I see soooooo many new comers I feel there desperation and desperation is a good place to start where many of us started but I then see they get a week or so under them sometimes a few months ,but then the hit a wall that could be lots of different reasons depending on each person’s life and they pick up the good thing is most are so desperate they come straight bk and start again and hopefully have learnt from what happened,but I believe when we first give up we don’t realize how much energy and time we need to give to ourselves staying clean and sober it’s a daily mindfulness ,some get clean and that’s about it maybe watch a few YouTube channels others get clean and start working all parts of there lives ie exercise,eating habits , building a solid foundation to there recovery like attending meetings with other sober friends ,reaching out to t.s daily, meditation,daily dairy and gratitude list I’m not saying all these things need doing but iook at it my addiction touched every part of my life so why wouldn’t I want my recovery to do the same it’s like flipping it on its head .sorry it’s so long but I’ve tried to cover what’s I’ve done in my 105 days clean from herion and benzos so if you can take on some hints and tips that have kept another safe in dark times…well I hope it can help you and others…
THANK YOU.
I went on a 3 hour hike outside of the city this morning. This is the first thing I’ve done like this in over 5 years! It felt so amazing to get out, and just breathe.
This app seriously has helped me more in the two days I’ve had it than anything else I’ve tried.
I hope I can carry this on and maybe one day be an inspiration to another as everybody on here has been to me so far.
The hardest thing with addiction for me is feeling alone.
Every addict has a different story and often times my addiction convinces me that nobody can relate and that using is the fix. This is obviously so far from the truth.
Welcome to the forum. You no longer have to feel alone, we’re all here for you. I have an addiction to opiates so I can relate. There’s few NA meetings by me but not at the times I can go so I’ve been doing AA and it’s been a tremendous help along with this forum. Join us on the check in thread, it’s a good form of accountability. Here’s the link:
Checking in daily to maintain focus #9
What a lovely day ,it so nice to give ourselves time to breath and time to heal,each day teaches us something about the new us and it feels amazing,we get good and bad days but as long as we have supppport and away to explain how were feeling it’s ok just remember to always be honest with yourself and others be it small or big, welcome to this community and the CARING ppl that make T.S what it is today.xx:rose: