I made it 12 whole days. & then today I relapsed. I drank a nipper and a half (big nips) & I didn’t even end up enjoying it. Idk why I did it, and honestly I’m so disgusted & embarassed. I thought I had it in the bag. I keep looking at my sober time and I don’t want to start over 
I am so fucking stressed and have so much going on right now. I need to start utilizing some other ways to deal, chill and cope with this thing we call life. Im disappointed in myself to say the least. ughhhh (VIRTUAL SCREAM)
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12 days is great. We’ve all restarted a hundred times it seems like. The thing I wish I knew early on is that it’s not just about not drinking but understanding why you drink in the first place. Understanding what a craving really means. What it is exactly that you’re craving. That can be really complex.
I was never the worst alcoholic, but had way too many messy and scary nights out. Figuring out why I did that was actually life-changing. It was more deeply rooted than I realized.
Give it some thought 
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Thank you , that is very helpful. & I know, this is my millionth time trying to get sober I think. But I thought I’d do it for real this time. Definitely have to start some type of recovery plan & start digging into the root of my addiction. I think big part of that is realizing that I’ve got to make time for myself to maintain my recovery. My days are so busy & they fly by so quick. I’m going to try not to get too discouraged about today, and “just keep swimming”
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Don’t think about it as starting over, I’m sure you learned some strategies you can keep using from those 12 days you were sober. I have lots of triggers myself (when I’ve had a bad day, a great day, days that end in y…you get the point). When I slip up, I really try to identify the why and what I could’ve done differently so I’m that much more prepared in the future.
I also don’t focus too much on the days. I know that can be incredibly motivating, but when your number goes back to zero, it’s a huge mental blow. Focus instead on self-care and listening to your body, whatever self-care looks like for you! hugs
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Make it simple try ameeting might help ,helped me stay sober wish you well
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Be proud of your 12 days, and keep going strong, and never think it’s in the bag because it’s not and it probably won’t ever be.
I dont know how many times I had to restart my counter too, and now that I got two years straight I still think it’s not in the bag. One day at a time. And again, be proud of what you’ve done, and keep up the good fight 
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