I had a lot going on. And it just got to be too much,i needed to be able to control something i wanted to feel something…im sorry…
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There no need to be sorry if you can learn from it and stop it from happening again. What can you add to your sobriety toolbox to help? 
Oh and welcome to the community/forum.
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Being human is hard ! Being a sensitive human with an addiction to alcohol is even harder . Just think of yourself as mastering a difficult sport , you might fall down a few times before you find your wings . You’re not alone x
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Maybe try a meeting makes it easier wish you well
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Being sad that you relapsed is very normal but that will not give you strength to prevail… Work on what caused you to revisit a life that you don’t like… You can beat this… Today is your new start to the rest and best days of your life and freedom… Welcome… 
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