Relapsed again 😞

[Dan.h84]

I’ve had 2 weeks solid of relapsing and feel so disappointed in myself. Few things went wrong and I went to alcohol and made it a lot worse. Day 0. But I can do this. Sick of this feeling but I know I’ll feel good again soon being sober

[Becsta]

Hi Dan,
Going by your previous post early September, I understand you relapsed with drinking for 2 weeks and said you would be starting over again? That was just under 2 weeks ago. Which means, going by this post, that starting over didn’t work out for you. I’m really sorry to hear that you are struggling lately…
It’s great that some leasons have come from it though - the first time relapsed you learnt you cannot moderate. This time learnt that alcohol isn’t a healthy or effective tool to turn to when things in life go wrong.
I read that you’ve been doing online meetings? I wonder if you have tried face to face meetings? as I found that going to meetings was a safe and helpful place to turn to when things in my life were going pear shaped and relapse was tempting…

100% agree you’ll feel better sober and 100% agree that you can do this - I believe we all have the capability, but we also need the true desire to want to stop and be willing 100% to commit and tell ourselves every day that “no matter what, just for today I will not pick up that first drink”. And if we struggle or feel tempted we dig deep into our recovery toolbox and utilise whatever supports we can. There’s soke helpful threads on here about building a ‘toolbox’, I’ll try to link one here for you.

It’s good to see you back, willing to start again. Hope to see you around more, this forum has been an amazing support for me.

Edited to add one of the toolbox threads. You may find some helpful ideas there

What's in your sobriety toolbox?

I’ve seen many of you mention having a sobriety toolbox, someone care to explain EXACTLY what that is or how it works? Do I just throw things in there that would remind me of why I shouldn’t feed into a craving…? Like would I throw in it something like the letters that each of my family members had to write me about how my addiction affected them when I was in rehab or a list of how to deal with cravings? How does it work? What do you have in your toolbox?

[Thirdmonkey]

Good morning. What were you doing before all of this to stay sober. What didnt work? What are you willing to do?

[Dan.h84]

Thank you so much. I really appreciate that

[Dan.h84]

Previously I reached a month sober and did some AA meetings online. Then I stopped attending and started to falsely think I could control it and started having a few drinks. At first I had 2/3 drinks and stopped. A few days later I started having more. I’ve accepted I can’t have any at all. After my last relapse I had some family issues and personal issues and then relapsed again. This time I’m going to attend meetings again, avoid my triggers and take myself out of temptation, I’ve been invited to a wedding in a few weeks and another get together. I’m not going to either as it could set me back. I’m also going to take back up some of my hobbies to keep busy after work too. I have to do this and know I can if I put my mind to it

[Law1]

Hi I know the feeling well, stay on here it will help you and definitely definitely one day at a time

[LeeHawk]

Those are great plans, friend. Lots of support out there. Glad you decided to quit digging.