Relapsed fml

Well fuck back in a bottom of many bottles I broke my sober streak of 17 months lost everything faster than I can drink . I forgot how easy it is to say fuck it I feel rough n I don’t know what to say


Maybe try a meeting wish you well


Thanks man just feeling rough

Glad your back. It may not feel like it at the moment, you are very fortunate. Fortunate to have ever made it to recovery at all. 17 months! be proud that you had that. Don’t dwell on letting the continuous time go. All any of us really have is today.

Your extremely fortunate to make it back. Most of us don’t. I barely did. I was willing to go to any lengths to make drinking work for me.

I’ve relapsed a lot. My last relapse that I call my final relapse taught me everything I needed to fully concede to my innermost self that I am alcoholic.

Chapter 3 of the big book describes it perfectly. It helps me keep it real. I hope it helps you.


Hi @JonathanH

First welcome back…realizing the action was toxic to your well being is HUGE!

I think most of us here can agree that sliding down the “fuck it” slide is VERY easy to do! Hell I slipped on too many times to count, but the positive here is your catching yourself now. You can’t change the slip, but you totally have the power to control this crash, and I think you know that, because well, your here today!

Tomorrow can, and will be, brighter if you allow it. Don’t focus on the failure is where I’m getting at. Focus on today, hone in on all the knowledge you obtained in that 17 months, and rise stronger!

This shit ain’t easy by any definition, and dwelling on the “fuck up” will only leave you to spiral!

Rise up my friend…reach out and grab onto your resources, and know today is a new damn day that you, and ONLY you own!

Glad to see you here…honored to walk with you!

Be blessed!



Me too, but lets go again right here and now this weekend! Focus, smile, try different approaches, open up more than before, you’ll win this, trust me :slightly_smiling_face:


I’ve been in those shoes. Respect the power of the liquid and understand your willpower is stronger. Stay the course my friend and everything will be ok. Welcome back! We always learn from our setbacks!


Welcome back, happy you made it. Like Jason said many of us don’t.

Drinking doesn’t erase everything you have learned, so those 17 months aren’t lost. I have heard at meetings lots how hard it is to have a head full of recovery and a belly full of booze.

Those “fuck it” days that I have I do what my first sponsor taught me. She always puts off using until the next day. So she feels like getting loaded now, life fucking sucks… she tells herself, “not today but maybe tomorrow”. She just keeps doing that until it passes and she has gotten through ALOT of shitty times in her recovery clean committing to 24 hours at a time. It works.

I know it’s hard to gather yourself after a relapse, I have been there and it took me forever, but try to accept it for what it is and just move on.

Sending lots of strength and a big ass hug.


Here with you on this one.


Everything will be ok, you already know you are capable of 17 months. Get back on track and do it again. Don’t beat yourself up about it. It happens to so many of us, we are all human. I truly believe that you will go even longer this time around or better yet, no more relapse! Be strong and stay blessed :raised_hands:



Thank you everyone it’s been a long time waking up in chaos



Awesome job on 17 months!!!

I’m sorry that you had a hiccup, but that’s what it was. A hiccup. So stand on your head, drink a glass of water through a paper towel and get past that moment. Don’t get too down on yourself for being human. Learn from it and let it make you stronger!

You didn’t lose ALL THAT SOBER TIME, you just had a hiccup in the middle. :relaxed:

1 Like

Well done for coming back. It’s not easy to do, we’ve all known someone that never made it back :pensive: time to flush out anything you have left. A long hot shower and a warm drink and we go again! Addiction is a bastard! If it were a person I would smash it’s face in! :angry: we are stronger than the voice in our head! @JonathanH, let’s go! Forward, together, we can do this. One step at a time we CAN beat our demons. I’m sending you a massive hug! You are worth a sober life! You’ve done 17 months you can do that again plus more. Be gentle with yourself my friend. :two_hearts::pray:t2:

1 Like


Don’t give up, iv failed 100s of times. What matters is u recognize it and now it’s time to change it. 17m is a hell of a run be proud of that. Now you have a goal for this time you got this

Love this Ray.

I’m nine days in. My advice will not compare to many “veterans” of sobriety but I will say i have motivation. My family is the best motivation for me. It’s a constant reminder of who I’m being sober for. Maybe focus on the just one thing to be sober for?

1 Like


Best of luck to you…

1 Like

I really appreciate that :heart:

1 Like