Good morning. 
It was nice to wake up to a response from you. I am glad some of what I said landed, I know its a lot to absorb, especially when we are in the thick of it.
I am not sure if you have found it yet but there is a check in thread here that helped me loads when I first cleaned up. It helped me stay accountable and I went there when i couldnt stop thinking about picking up and people talked me off the ledge. I will link it below.
Checking in daily to maintain focus #59
One of the best parts of being clean is all any of us has is today. Recovery is a 24 hour thing, no matter how many back to back days you have. We wake up and we start fresh everyday. Everyday we have to comit to staying clean for another 24 hours. That made that first while a little more reachable, knowing I didnt have to look past today. Just take it hour by hour if you have to. Somedays will fly by and others will drag and you will feel like shit. Regardless, you are never going to be alone unless you choose that. So keep coming back. 