This is very hard for me. I’ve tried to hit my goals of more than 3 months of soberity. My body and mind keeps nagging me about porno when situation becomes difficult. My family has a history of an addiction to pornography. I’m fighting with God’s help to break free from porno. I cannot wait until I become 100% free from Porn. Been fighting against Porn since 2015 when I realized that many of those women were being disrespected, oppressed, raped,molestated,etc. It’s very disgusting. I cannot imagine if it was my own daughter going thru that. That’s very sad. Porn has really pulled my attention from keeping my life productivity. I have goals and dreams that I wanted to accomplish.
I’ve been a speedskater for all together of 14 years. Then now I’ve taken 2 years off…my confident and my passion for life crashed. I didn’t realize I was building my confident thru attention and women. I didn’t know Porn was my place of escape from any kind of serious stress or escape from any serious situation that comes into my way. I thought Porn was because I was attracted to hot women but I was wrong, there was a deeper behind it on why I keep falling back to Porn. Again a place to escape from reality, place for happiness and place to kill boredom or idleness. I was shocked.
I’m fighting really hard that Porn is not an answer for me on coping with any serious problems or situation. I just have to change and stay away from all triggers such as removing Instagram and Facebook off of my phone. Then the TV…that has web browser…I finally figured out how to get those blocked having no access to it. It is very scary that I need to completely cut off Porn out of my life because it was my way of coping with any kind of stress. That’s horrible but I know there’s so much healthier way of coping with stress such as nature,yoga,exercise,Bible study group,hang out with friends,reading books that shifts my focus to somewhere else.
I’m looking forward to become really involved in this community to help me find plenty of ideas on how I can get myself back again and start enjoying life instead of being a slave to Porn. I love u all for your support and being part of my life. I am aiming for 2022 winter Olympics in speedskating.
Yes, a lot of dangers from porn. Sucks you away from going out and finding real relationships. I went through a little phase of porn, and felt it sucking me in, was weird. I would literally waste hours searching through various porn vids. I moved away from it, because I realized it was making me very comfortable being alone, and not having to date, just fulfilling my sexual needs on my own. I noticed I started getting depressed from it, and then went on this semen retention kick I read about on an anti porn site. Male sperm has a shitload of nutrients in it, so when your having multiple organisms daily you are bound to feel weak, and depressed. I felt great with the retention, very strong, clear mind, ect. A lot of athletes will do semen retention weeks prior to playing/fighting. Anyways, point of my story is I’m glad I moved on from that crap fairly quick. Maybe saving some of that sperm will help you get to the Olympics! Porn is a dark place, get out of there and search for a real relationship, even if it’s with yourself. Good luck, don’t dwell on the relapse, start over again, you know right from wrong
Hey man. I hear you, it’s so hard. It sounds like you have great clarity of your situation and you seem to be really self aware. I believe in you and i know you’ll get there. Well, it’s not really ever ‘getting there’ as life is a journey and the journey is the destination. So take it one day at a time, one moment at time.
I suffer from porn addiction too. I’m only just over a week clean. My addiction is unfortunately linked to drugs, specifically coke. When I see porn, I want the coke to go with it, and if I take coke, I want to to be alone with my porn. I’ve had sessions that have lasted over 12 hours. I feel so ashamed and humiliated and depleted after. No one in my life knows about my secret and it makes me feel so isolated. Happy I can share here.
Good luck and keep going. I know your passion in speed skating will prevail.
It’s nice to hear back from you, Mike. It’s been awhile. Sorry to hear that you’re having a tough time with this.
Relapse, for me, always comes with learning experiences. Sounds like you’re learning from this last relapse. I, too, have to work very hard at keeping my environment safe.
Keep learning and growing, my friend.
Thanks so much for your support my man!! I believe it’s a sense of purpose that I had to discover. And understanding the purpose my life was the key. It seems that I’ve found some and going to give it a try. It’s American sign language teacher. I love sign language and I love exotic cars so now I’m running a business renting out my exotic car. More coming. I feel more productivity now by setting daily goals and figured out what I’m truly passionate about.
Thank you so much for your encouragement. Yeah the relapse was very tough. The key was I had to understand what the triggers were. So I had to keep my lists of triggers so that way I can protect myself from falling again thru the power name of the lord.