Its hard to sit here and put into words how I’m feeling towards myself right now. Disappointed, ashamed, and unworthy to be loved. I know I am worthy of love. But right now, that is my genuine feeling.
“I got drunk.”
Seems like the story that haunts my life. But its the one i allow to continue being told.
Here I am on day 2 (again) to say, this is it. Im done with it.
Ive always been so afraid to quit because of the things I might lose. I can’t meet up for drinks during the game, im not gonna be able to meet up after work and have a couple, and my camping trip. Once a year i meet up with 10-15 of my friends and we just camp out and stay drunk for 3 days.
But what will I lose if I dont? My job? My house? My family? None of those are worth losing.
Ive never woken up and thought to myself, “man, I’m so glad I got drunk and acted a fool of myself. I dont even know how I got home.”
I hear you…for the missing out feeling try listening to or read Allen Carrs easy way to stop drinking its great for mindset…plus all those things you said you enjoy doing that involve drinking…is it the drinking you enjoy or the company? I often ask myself now im sober if all those times i had such a great time would have been any less enjoyable had i not been drinking or was it just part of it? If the people you spend time with care then im sure theyd still want to spend time with you wether you drink or not, there are many other things to do…
Those things you’re listing are things that had crossed my mind too. But currently I’ve been sober to a game with my mates, and to my first gig sober. Have ticked off first holiday, and many summer drinks passed up.
My advice would be to just be sober today, then the next, then the next. That one day at a time thing really does work.
Avoid any big temptations early on and get your resolve locked in.
Keep fighting everyday in the beginning, it’ll get easier bro
If you make a list of the good parts of drinking and the bad, you’ll quickly see that the bad absolutely demolish the good. The good is pals, going out, whatever - but do you remember all of those times? Do you spend way too much money? Do you feel like shit the next day? Did you say something stupid or offensive? For every one good moment there are eight horrible ones around the corner. I’m still trying to maneuver my way through doing the things I love while staying sober. It’s difficult sometimes, but once I start making that list in my head again, it’s pretty clear.
You got this, friend!
I think you will miss out less then you think!
You can do most of all things sober when you have more sober days under your belt so you are strong enough to say no to the first one.
And in my experience: if you have a longer strech of days your interest in some kind of activaties are changing. For example your camp out trip?
When you get used to live sober getting wasted is no longer a goal for itself But maybe deer watching in the early morning is!
Like @Knives69 already mentioned: make a list!
It helps to see what you gain too and that is so much more then you think.
But maybe deer watching in the early morning is!