Secret life

I sit here in my work canteen surrounded by police colleagues, listening to their plans for a ‘dry August’ - in silence.
Knowing that none of these people know I am sober or why I am sober. Sat in my anxiety wondering if they’re going to ask me any questions about alcohol. Knowing I am a recovering cocaine and alcohol user and that the subject is not one of comfort.
No one here will know my pride for my 292 day’s clean or what that’s had entailed, the struggle, the commitment and the secret. That I am an addict in recovery but none of these ‘friends’ I work with will ever understand.

It’s a lonely place to be when I see these people more than anyone in my life. It makes me wonder if anyone else is sitting here quietly, secretly proud.


It’s quality, not quantity that counts. In my first year, especially, I felt that my ‘true’ life was only 2 hours a day, while traveling to and from the daily AA meeting. As your deep acceptance of your own sobriety grows, the normal conversations of friends and colleagues will bother you less. I’ve found that to be so for me.

And I’m proud of your 292 days, too! That’s how it’s done!

Blessings on your house :pray:.


Yes I’m in the same situation! I’m sitting in my barber shop with my colleague and she’s not got a clue ! I’m not in any shame as I’m greatful my addiction brought me to my knees as I have a life beyond my wildest dreams today … I’m definitely a better person to work with ! I’m never late or sneaking off to have a hit to make myself feel better… embrace your amazing gift of sobriety. It’s a brilliant thing your doing … X


Well done buddy, for me after nearly 34 years everyone knows who i am in work and neighbours , but i understand that your private life outside work is your choice wish you well

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292 is amazing and we are all proud of you!! Keep up the great work!!


Congratulations on your 292 days. That’s awesome work. Something to be rightfully proud of.
Regarding your work colleagues, all they need to know is that you don’t drink. So if they ask you, you say, well I don’t drink so it’s a normal month for me thanks!
Embrace your life don’t be scared of being sober and clean.
No one needs to know tha gory details. But you have a right to be who you are.


Hello I also work around Law Enforcement. I don’t tell them anything. Those guys can be the biggest boozers (they deal with a LOT of stress). I just say, “oh no I’m done with all that. No more.” Because I shrug it off and don’t make a big deal about it… They don’t either! LoL They just laugh and smile at me and move on with the conversation. You don’t have to divulge anything you don’t want to in my opinion.