Selfish decisions

So like I said before. I gave up drinking for 2 years on my own just by saying no whenever the choice creeped up on me. However this year after taking a bar managers job and working 80 hour weeks I didn’t say no on more then 1 occassion and ended up having some serious binjing sessions.
So now day 5 of soberness all over again.
I spoke to my girlfriend and tried to explain that if I go drinking something takes over inside me and I go all or nothing. And her reply was simple, hard but true.
It’s a simple decision if you DECIDE you are having 1, you have already chosen to be selfish, mean, unreliable, and useless to our relationship.
She is very right, as an alcoholic I’m trying to make excuses for my behaviour when I’m drunk. But I wasn’t drunk when I made the decision to have the first drink so that doesn’t make me an alcoholic that just means I’m selfish.


I feel your pain my husband is ready to leave me and I’m so scared and lost and confused and he’s done with the bullshit and I’m telling him I want to get help and go to intensive outpatient therapy and get help and I think he’s really going to leave this time. I’m scared and don’t know what to do

For you this is what I can say and u won’t like it. Quit for you, if you lose everything in the process it will be hard but imagine how easy it would be to get what you deserve back sober. True love is forever so if you can sort your life out and get back to who he fell in love with he will fall in love with you all over again


Thank you so much for your words. You are right it’s just in the mean time, this sobriety road to start on and having him to turn to for support. But, I get what you’re saying.

I know it’s a lonely time and you just want to tell him u would do anything to stay with him. But all he sees is empty promises. Nothing about what you are about to do will be easy. It’s going to get a lot harder. For me the best thing is time away from the people I hurt distance grows the heart fonder. Your husband needs a break to if he is leaving because of your drinking he us not leaving because he doesn’t love you, he is probably leaving because he is afraid to watch you slowly killing yourself. This is everything I went through before. 10 years ago when I went to rehab at my family request for cocaine addiction haven’t touched it since

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