Setting Goals

Had 2 beers on Thursday night and i have gotten alot better from drinking hard alochol to 2 bottles a wine every night and now a beer or 2

I have been doing well with not going crazy over the weekend because i have a beer during the week

My initial goal was to seriously cut back and not to depend on alochol to feel happy. I am now working hard to lower my blood pressure even more by not binge drinking

Is it possible to drink responsibly and in moderation when you were once a binge drinker in college ???

Personally, I donā€™t believe so. You may be able to maintain that ā€œnormalā€ level of drinking for a bit but it will eventually lead back to old ways (get worse over time).

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Hereā€™s what some dudes in the 1930s wrote about your questionā€¦

Chapter 3

MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM

Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.

We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.

We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals - usually brief - were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.

We are like men who have lost their legs; they never grow new ones. Neither does there appear to be any kind of treatment which will make alcoholics of
our kind like other men. We have tried every imaginable remedy. In some instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse. Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasnā€™t done so yet.

Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right- about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people!

Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums - we could increase the list ad infinitum.

We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself. Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it

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Such a good read! I think with great determination, mindufness and willpower i would be able to moderate my drinking AT ALL TIMESā€¦ I could have half a beer and leave itā€¦ But the key in this is, that if i didnt have a problem with drinking I wouldnā€™t have to use my willpower etcā€¦ Somethings a miss and Iā€™m still trying to fugure this out whilst staying safe and sober.

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Iā€™m aware this isnā€™t new,but I am kicking it to the top again for several reasons. First because I just found it. Second, because there are some new people coming on who might find this beneficial. Third because with some of the recent posting questions,I feel this is a excellent example of a not brand new post that could be very useful to someone. I have been here awhile, and just saw this. Itā€™s only four post,but it sure hits home. My appreciation to the ones who posted here.

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Iā€™m glad you found this post beneficial. We all have to support each other

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Yep, I think I have tried pretty much every ā€˜tacticā€™ mentioned here to attempt controlled drinking. It works for a while then boom back to square one. So depressing though. It would be great to keep a handle on it , which is why I guess so many of us try it (controlled drinking).

Thatā€™s where Iā€™m at right now. I just reset my tracker. I always think I can drink in moderation and it always gets out of control. I am tired of this never ending cycle. The only good thing is that I am not where I used to be so there is hope

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That sounds scary. Iā€™m glad you decided to get sober :slight_smile:

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I know exactly what you mean. There is definitely hope if you allow yourself to believe it.:slight_smile:

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For me, the problem with trying to drink moderately was that with limits, it wasnā€™t fun. I could only enjoy drinking if I could have as much as I wanted. And as much as I wanted was enough for me to black out and stew in a miserable hangover over and over again, which is not what a normal drinker aims for. When I drank, I wanted to tear shit up, including my own life. I know if I tried to stop at one, that old feeling would come up and swallow me again.

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Yeah I am extremely ashamed of myself that I got completely wasted . On Sunday I got drunk at my friends bday party and drove home. I was doing over 100 mph down my street. I could have crashed and died or hit someone. I donā€™t trust myself anymore. I know Iā€™m upset at my own life right now but I canā€™t make those decisions anymore

What I have learned is that itā€™s best to try not to dwell so much on the guilt and shame because it usually (for me anyway) leads to more self destructive behaviour.
I would use this to learn from the experience and try to move forward, focussing on the positives, like your determination to keep trying to stay sober and the knowledge of how fortunate you are that you or someone else didnā€™t die because that would have destroyed your life one way or another. Please stay safe and donā€™t drink and driveā€¦

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It doesnā€™t sound like you really drank to enjoy yourself then. Am I right?
I wonder if that makes it easier to quit because for me , I would drink to 'feel better '. To avoid depression, to ā€˜have funā€™ā€¦so I associate happy times with drinking (despite the reality that it has since brought so much pain and suffering) which makes quitting extremely hard.

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