I thought it would be easier after 6 months. And at times I can ALMOST forget. Then suddenly some feeling or sensation will try and drag me back. The aspects of my using that caused danger to me and those I love are outweighing the supposed ‘thrill’ of using. I’ve just repeated a ‘using’ behaviour and even though it was ‘relatively harmless’ the feelings in my body were very similar to using and I felt my body think it was back in that situation.
It was difficult to break away from but I did it and am now writing on here. The battle is so so hard and the reward for winning the battle is getting to fight it again only this time with more experience and knowledge that we have won before.
Stay strong everyone who is struggling. The discomfort we feel now is nothing compared to the alternative.
