SLAA accountability partners

Hey everyone. Really struggling here with contacting my qualifier and still seeing him. I’m almost 48 hours from contacting/seeing him but I’m still struggling to block. If anyone is willing to be an accountability partner please let me know :heart:

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Hi Rms91, welcome to this great forum, I’ve been through the wringer with SLAA and mental health issues too, you’re not alone you’ll find friends here who can help here! I’m not super qualified to be a sponsor or anything but I’m willing to help out if I can. I feel for you I know relationships can be super tough on us! :hugs:

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Thank you! I have a sponsor she is wonderful! Finished step one Friday so working on step 2 this week. I’m currently in a long term relationship and that’s why it makes me feel worse when I contact my current qualifier. I’m just really struggling with it all.

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Hey that’s great you have a sponsor and working the steps! I’m currently working a workbook through Emotions Anon and will be glad when it’s over, I feel like I’m really getting to know my shadow self (questions about my distant past)
BTW, how do you mean by the term qualifier?

That’s great! It will be over before you know it. This dark stuff is SO hard. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel, so they tell me. A qualifier is someone that I have a fantasy relationship over- nothing about it is legitimate but I make up shit in my head about what our life would look like, how our relationship would be etc, without actually being involved in a relationship. It’s rather annoying lol but ive always done this I just never realized it. And for each person I had that fantasy life with over the years- when it didn’t play out like I wanted I would find someone else.

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I do the exact same thing. I didn’t realize there was a term for it! Thank you. I learned something! :innocent:

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Thanks Rms91 for clarifying! I had a love addiction dysfunction where I made my partner my higher power~~very costly, be careful. As far as the 12 steps go are you deepening a faith or exploring something new to connect with HP?
Ive explored Buddhism quite a bit over the years but Taoism helps me with the way to be in tune with Universes’ power, still new to me though. Good luck on your journey and careful with those relationship obsessions, glad to hear your in a 12 Step community, WTG!