So this is my first time trying too stay sober I am 74 days today.. but I need some advice

So this is my first time trying too stay sober I am 74 days today… and my relationship is making this all very hard we was both in a sober living house close to each other but hardly ever got to see each other we both have phones but it seemed like the only time he would text me cuz he would always come up with an excuse to not talk on the phone, so when he did text he was always talking about how I need too work harder or something along those lines how I wasn’t doing good enough… but everyone else thanks I’m doing great for my first time. He how ever he has been too more rehabs then I can count even the one he was in he had been in before. I say was because Thursday he got kicked out he told me it was cuz he dropped dirty for just alcohol and others are telling me there was drugs too… and since he left he texted me maybe 6 times an called one time an didn’t even talk for more then 2 mins an all he had to say was that it’s was just alcohol an that I need to stay here witch I already planned on. But this is stressing me out I love him alot I couldn’t sleep last night cuz I was having bad dreams about something bad happing to him… I don’t know what to do and have noone outside of the program that’s safe too talk to because everyone I know is on something… I keep talking myself down because I want to go find him or something… I don’t know what to do…


Welcome to the community. I think, if it were me, first and foremost, I would concentrated on sobriety. Work your program, stay sober…and everything will work out the way it needs to.


Glad you’re here & I too had reasons I could have used to walk out of rehab/sober livin, but damn glad I didn’t. Listening to the self hustle in our heads will often get us right back on the wheel again.

He’s gotta want it more than anything too, we can’t make him do that. Only he has that control right?

You got yours, I got mine. I say we stay in the middle where it’s safer. Hugs to ya

1 Like

Hi!! I noticed you named yourself Lostcaus. I hope you don’t believe that, 74 days sober is AMAZING!

Please concentrate on you, if I were you, I’d let him go. He’s trouble and most likely doesn’t want you sober since he’s not. Misery loves company.

Work on yourself, build your confidence and realize, you are a fucking catch!! Stay strong and stay sober! :hugs: :purple_heart:

EDIT: I see your screen name is Foundcaus, that is PERFECT, sorry, I always look at the hidden name, lol.

That does sound frustrating and yeah, it can drive you nuts sometimes worrying about other people. Only he knows what he did and that is his thing, you know?

I hope you keep talking yourself down and stay where you are at. And even more, I hope you start really focusing on what you can control…which is you, your mindset and your sobriety. I know you will feel so much better if you take care of yourself and build up some self love and sober time. I hope you do that for yourself. :heart: Sometimes things happen for a reason that we don’t really understand at the time. :heart: