Sober day 9, bad thoughts

Hi I am 32 years old married and have three kids under 11.
Im on day 9 no alcohol and was feeling ok yesterday, then today I’m having thoughts in my head about drinking already.
Me and the hubby are going to book a holiday abroad for hopefully this June with the kids and I’m now telling myself I can indeed have a few glasses of wine when we go!!!
And before anyone says I shouldn’t go on holiday I’m definitely doing it for hubby and kids.
But I’m only on day 9 and having these thoughts. And the plan was to give up Alcohol altogether as I clearly have issues. Any help would be appreciated also I have never had sober holidays or occasions before. I had a sober New year there for the first time in years and have been brought up with alcohol. Both my parents are and were alcoholics. Hate confiding in my hubby because a few weeks down the line I will back track everything and convince him I CAN do controlled drinking. Then he will fold like he always does. (That sounds terrible I know)
I would love to be able to go on holiday or celebrate my birthday occasions without alcohol it’s like I’m trying to reprogram my brain. I bought two new books, We are the Luckiest! and Mommy doesn’t drink here anymore! So will give them a little go.
My mum was about 3 and a half months sober then had a little blip so she is now 20 odd days and goes to A A (she is doing well) and we have made up about 8 months ago but it’s hard because I don’t want to make my journey and hers a social thing if that makes any sense. Because I feel like it’s private and don’t like talking about it or telling people about myself. My husband actually said not tell tell his mum or family that I’m off alcohol because I only would end up going back on it and would embarrass myself. It’s only my mum that knows I’m not drinking
and some of my family members.
Thanks for reading just had to get some of that off my chest


One day at a time.
Its pretty normal to be having thoughts of drinking so early on.

In a manner, you are reprogramming your brain, thats what part of breaking an addiction is.

Reading the book should help.

Attending meetings is also a really good idea as well. I know myself and a lot of people on here swear by them. There is also the option of doing online meetings as well.

As for keeping it private, thats totally up to you. At the end of the day its your business and your life, if you don’t feel the need to tell anyone you have every right to keep it to yourself.

Now 9 days is awesome, so don’t kid yourself at all on that. Be proud of yourself for the steps you have taken so far.
Stay strong, keep faith in yourself. The days will get easier and as they do life gets so mch better.
You can do this


Oh also!
Keep popping onto this website! Its a great place for help, support, a place to vent or ask questions and motivation


I had trouble with the thought of not being able to drink on vacation in early sobriety. Once I got the four month mark, those thoughts stopped. I’m just a happy non-drinker right now. I have also learned to live one day at a time. I’ll worry about tomorrow tomorrow. We Are The Luckiest inspired The Luckiest Club which is an online sober community with lots of zoom meetings. I attend at least 4-5 a week. Wouldn’t have stayed sober without it or my local AA group. Rooting for you. Just worry about staying sober today. That vacation is a ways off.


Hi Jackie, l’m on Day 11, not far in front of you.
Don’t think too far into the future!

‘One day at a time’ and ‘Easy does it’ are good AA quotes to have running through your mind often in these early days of our sobriety.

You are not going on holiday till June, that’s a good 5 months from now! You don’t have to worry about whether you can drink then or not.
Just worry about not picking up a drink for the next 24 hours. lt sounds like a lot of your concern is around the thought of not drinking ever again and the fear associated with how you will cope with that? If so, l hear you!

Also,when l have another crack at sobriety nowadays, l don’t make a big deal of it by making an announcement to my loved ones. And l certainly don’t make promises! It doesn’t help and makes you feel like dirt when you let your family down.
I have 3 young teenage daughters who want nothing more than me to just quit drinking forever and to promise the same.
But l have disappointed them too many times, so what l do to reassure them is just tell them how many days sober l am, and they say “Good job,Mum!”

All the best and well done on your efforts so far :heart:


Oh my… Don’t wreck your holiday.

The alcoholic voice is going on in your head, I can remember my own version of it and the funny thing is, with sobriety you start to realise how stupid that voice is, that it will say anything to get you to drink and also it is tricky/sneaky as hell… If you agree in the idea to drink on holiday you’re giving it a foot in the door and chances are you’ll be drinking soon… If you agree to drink on holiday you are admitting that alcohol is a “treat” (it isn’t, it’s a life wrecker), but by keeping the mindset that it is a treat, you are unlikely to escape it’s grip any time soon.