Hi everyone. Just yesterday I did an interview to live in an oxford sober house and got in. I moved in yesterday also and I’ve been experiencing just crazy emotions. So much up and down. I feel good that I’m out of my dad’s house where there was alcohol making it harder for me to progress, but also just at times sad and depressed that it came to this in a way. I guess I just feel a little defeated that I felt I had to be in an environment removed from the triggers. Not sure how to feel sometimes either. It’s been very mentally and emotionally draining since yesterday. I just want to enjoy life while recovering, but it’s really hard sometimes
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In early sobriety our emotional, mental and physical health really needs looking after, its been neglected for a long time and will take a while to adjust back to normal.
Its really great you took the initiative to get into sober living, being around alcohol is really not helpful.
Enjoying life will come, but for now be patient with yourself. Allow yourself to feel, cry, laugh, sleep etc. Your body needs to heal.
Give yourself a break, live life ODAAT and just focus on getting thro the hour, the day, do the work and enjoyment and satisfaction it will soon start to come.
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Congratulations on your new living arrangements. I think you did something very brave here and something you should be proud of. Allow yourself to be proud of taking responsibility for your health by taking necessary steps in your sobriety journey.
We all need support and people who help us along the way into sobriety. The sober living house is a great opportunity for you. Yes, it’s emotional. Allow yourself to feel these emotions without any judgement. And then evaluate the facts and focus on the positive.
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You’re absolutely right. I’ve been battling alcohol and mental health issues a long time. I know what I’m doing now is ultimately better for me. I hear about the freedom people experience all the time in AA and while I’m happy for them I also sometimes get a little impatient for my time to come with that. Realistically I know it took all of them time though. I’m getting better at recognizing my feelings and being honest. Still a lot of work ahead of me, but I think living here will be good to teach me responsibility while I have more freedom to make my recovery what I want it to be without worrying about alcohol in the house or my dad still treating me like a child sometimes
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Thank you. I’m proud of myself, but still a little scared in a way. I want to keep seeing the progress without being held back by immediate triggers all the time so I know this is better for me. As soon as I got here my car overheated too so now my new roommate has been helping to fix the issues. Super grateful for that though. I’m not good with cars so it’s incredible to be instantly connected with someone who is. Just trying to stay as positive as I can, but hard to be positive constantly
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Have you been able to see a Dr regarding your mental health? I know when I stopped drinking I really needed a review of medications and new one prescribed.
Often our depression rears its ugly head when we get sober and needing some help is ok, its just a helping hand thats all.
Ive never done AA so i cant speak for ‘AAers’ but when I had some sober time (1yr ish) good mental health care and support from sober people(here) I really started to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it wasn’t a train 
so hang in there.
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Yeah I see a psychiatrist for medication management and a therapist every week. AA has been the biggest help for me though honestly. It’s how I found this house actually. Through people in the rooms. I’ll get through it, but I know I’m still gonna have a lot of ups and downs more than likely for a while
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Im glad you’re being looked after.
Don’t forget we are in your pocket if you need us! 
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You don’t have to be positive all the time. All feelings and emotions are valid. You have to learn to accept the dark things and negative emotions, and learn behaviours to deal with the shitty stuff in life without reaching for your DOC. You are on the right path here.
Keep on going ODAAT 
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This is a good discussion on what to expect as far as feelings and general structure from sober living homes or oxford homes. Im basically in all the forums these days as I’ll be travelling for work thru end of June and there are ZERO meetings where I’m at. When I get to Mexico City though in late May there are in-persons but still haha! What to Expect from a Sober Living Home? - My Philadelphia Sober Living I finished rehab last November and was in sober living for 2 months after 
now doing 5 zoom meetings a week, mostly the MidNite group in NYC which is on the NY intergroup website and has a lot of young people constantly which for me is super helpful
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Yeah I honestly enjoy the oxford house I’m in. It comes with some sacrifices and can get hectic if everyone is trying to use the kitchen, but in reality my mind is much as peace there. They don’t force us to go to meetings, but I go to one pretty much every day. I was already going to 4 to 5 a week before that but makes it easier now actually because I adhere to my own schedule. Things are honestly pretty good. I really try to focus on that and being grateful even when my alcoholic brain acts up and tries to lie to me
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Just read your original post and glad to hear you’re still at the sober living and pushing forward and doing good. I’ve been to many sober livings over the years And it was always a good choice for me to go there to get back on track Or to work on my sobriety in a better environment. The only difference this time is that I actually took advantage of the opportunities and advice and connected with the other people in the house. I’m still at the same sober living I’ve been at for the last 11 months but where I’m at you move up a list and eventually you can get your own apartment across the street Which is where I’m at now. I still go to mandatory meetings across the street two days a week and Still hang out there or eat there sometimes. I’m reminded of those times like you said having to deal with all the different personalities, sharing a room with two or three people, Having a really busy kitchen especially after work. But one thing I realized early on and still realize is forming connections with the other people in the house and motivating each other to go to outside meetings even if we’re not obligated. I’m grateful these places exist to help people like us. There actually is Oxford locations where I’m at but that’s probably the only sober living I have not been to in my city. As I’m sure you know and understand don’t be in a rush to leave. Continue to build a solid foundation for your recovery, build a routine, save your money, and then when the time is right you can move forward with your life. Grateful for your post And reaching out about this subject. Keep pushing forward. Life will only continue to get better and better staying sober and working at recovery. These are some of the things I have to remind myself. @mikedrums1205
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Yeah I am in no rush to leave. I really want to keep working on my recovery. I’m learning a lot and about how sick I really am. I’ve been having a rough last couple weeks mentally and spiritually honestly and it’s then where I’m extra grateful for the house I live in because living with my dad before and all the alcohol around the house made things very tough for me. Even if I get anxious while in the house I have a space to calm down and try to get grounded again. Most of us keep to ourselves outside the house meeting but we do talk a little in passing and all. Things are a lot better than I can always realize because I keep getting in my own way. Either way I really do love living at the oxford house honestly. A lot of people in those situations or are itching to get out, but I just see it as a time to aid in my recovery without setting a time limit on it
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