In addiction I also thought I was choosing for myself and my happiness. At least initially. Only now I see how I can truly choose for myself by being sober and choosing recovery. By living my life better, being mindful, and truly choosing my own road. For me that has meant going for intensive psychotherapy in a group where together (and guided by two therapists) me and 8 other folks have looked within ourselves for the last 19 months. I grew a lot. I dare to say I am becoming a better human being. Happier, stronger, more emphatic. By choosing myself I am becoming more social too. I love the road I’m on. My own road. Just like you all do yours and we support each other in staying our own courses.
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Yeah it’s what I like about Buddhism, that our true nature, Buddha nature, awakened self (or non-self 
), whatever, is within us.
Someone on the forum told me about Plum Village a while ago. I find it very accessible although I am rubbish at committing to regular meditation practice. Lots of stuff of YouTube and loads of Thich Nhat Hanh books out there.
There’s also the Dalai Lama book The Art of Happiness. Which is a psychotherapist uncovering the parallels between modern day psychology and Buddhist wisdom. It’s a good read!
I also love tea 
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This is such a fascinating conversation.
I am agnostic, used to be quite religious but over the last decade I have stopped for various reasons. I don’t identify with the higher power being a part of my not drinking so know that AA isn’t for me. I appreciate that others manage that,
but I just can’t fully engage in something without total belief in it. I have always thought that I was quite a spiritual person really but the science has helped me through the last 50 days. I agreed with William Porter when he asked why would God ignore children with cancer but help a middle aged lawyer to stop drinking. By learning the science behind addiction I have got some control back.
I think what I am essentially saying is I want to take an active role in staying sober, and need to do it for myself. I loved your list @LAB So much of that is what I have enjoyed.
I also agree that I don’t define myself as an addict. I don’t want any of the labels, just to be a person that doesn’t drink.
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I’m more of an agnostic but I get it. This is a great book.
Staying Sober Without God: The Practical 12 Steps to Long-Term Recovery from Alcoholism and Addictions https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07MBVCS29/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_ECP9GY38SKYTH5WY77K6
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Wow this is an awesome thread. I don’t believe in shit anymore other than me being responsible for myself and my life. Recovering from 20 years of Christianity here, thanks for making this thread 
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Love that 
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Hi @Rockstar24777 !! So happy to see you in this thread! This thread has definitely made my day better 
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It totally made mine too! Ahhhh what a relief to find, I love this
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It’s a breath of fresh air!
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Absolutely 
!!!
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I’m at work @anon42928441 or I would share my thoughts on the fuckery of religion and gods etc. lol. It took a very tragic situation to flip everything upside down in my world to snap me the fuck out of the lie. I’m still very very pissed off that I fell for that shit for so many years. I look forward to talking to you and the others here though when I get more time! 
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I am absolutely looking forward to that! I know exactly what you mean by being lied to for so long and the unfortunate thing was that I was brought up thinking it was normal and it is most definitely not. So happy you’re here @Rockstar24777 !!
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Thank you JennyH. Well said, I don’t like the idea of calling myself a recovering anything. I find it better to think of myself simply as someone who doesn’t drink. It feels better to me. Empowering.
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I’ve said this before in another thread but repeating it here. For myself I rather call it discovery instead of recovery. I started using at such a young age that I got the feeling I’m not in the process of recovering anything. Not much to recover.
Instead I feel I’m on a road of discovery. Discovering my true self. Discovering the possibilities I have. Discovering new connections. Discovering expanding old connections. Discovering loads of good stuff for myself and for those around me.
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I like this a lot @Mno. I also started using drugs and alcohol early and all of my adult life until I got sober…more than 40 years of using and a full life…I literally had no idea of what truly experiencing and working thru my feelings was or even what my feelings were without the haze of alcohol, drugs, a hangover, etc. I had zero experience of engaging and being in life without that veil. Uncovering, unwrapping, unveiling, discovering, engaging, revealing…these terms (and others I haven’t thought of yet!)…they describe so wonderfully the gift that is this journey of sobriety. So thank you, for sharing that wisdom!! 
This resonates as well in regard to stepping into our power and our self…which has been, and continues to be, a strong component in my journey.
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Totally agree with the last 3 posts. I have been drinking all my adult life, and using it to block out problems. I have found it so strange that I am having dreams and thoughts all the time about my late teens (boyfriend, friends from then). It is almost like my brain is now dealing with stuff it should have done over 20 years ago. I am learning again how to be me. Love the idea of being on a journey of discovery.
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I really like this, and that is exactly it. No labels, just simply you. Our identity isn’t wrapped up in whether we drink or not.
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