For decades I had a huge gap in my memory, most of my twenties especially were gone. It’s the time I smoked the most weed. One by one memories from that period start popping up in my mind. Both dreaming and while I’m awake. I used to think those years were lost to me forever. To be totally honest this is something I actually can call recovery… Recovery of stuff I thought lost for ever. Recovery as part of my Discovery of myself. 
5 Likes
I have used the word “recovery” before simply for the sake of clarity, but I love hearing different descriptors people use. I think I prefer to look at how I can be my best self. It’s a process of trying to be and do better but without beating myself up in that process, finding balance in life and doing the best with what I have and what my circumstances are. Trying to be kind to myself and others.
7 Likes
I am not an athiest, however, y’all have given me so much to think about. Truly enjoying reading this thread. I appreciate all of you.
10 Likes
Maybe the peeling of the layers? Or an unfolding, from when we held ourselves so tightly in abuse of our selves? An opening…expanding?
In any case, my journey has led me to this book…just starting and finding it engaging…so am sharing on this very engaging thread.
8 Likes
Oh, interesting! Thanks for sharing!
1 Like
This makes me so happy and I feel the same! I feel really comfortable here and appreciate everyone who is here 
2 Likes
Yes yes yessss. That is exactly why I refuse to go to AA. I just read the book “Sober Curious” and it was great. And she has an Alternative to the 12 steps which I loved:
- Choose abstinence
- Just say no to moderation
- Know your triggers
- Embrace sober firsts
- Don’t make booze the bad guy
- Don’t judge others or preach
- Be grateful for the reminders
- Be honest
- Find your sober curious crew
- Feel your feelings
- Replace Spirits with spirit
- Remember the big picture
15 Likes
Just wanted to say I so appreciate the like minds sharing here. We aren’t all the same but it is really comforting to feel a sense of belonging here.
9 Likes
For sure! This is amazing! 
1 Like
That’s exactly what TS should be all about (and by and large it is too). It’s great to have this safe space within a largely safe greater space.
5 Likes
Yes! I couldn’t agree more! 
1 Like
We are NOT alone. I’m with you!
3 Likes
I’m atheist and sober, and I’ve also had the same issues with NA. But thankfully I was lucky enough to find people within NA who were also atheist, or at least open minded enough to respect my beliefs (or lack thereof).
When AA groups refuse to be respectful or inclusive of people without a higher power, all they’re doing is isolating & pushing away people who still need help, which is counter to what it’s supposed to do. They’re essentially making atheists less likely to get sober & more likely to relapse.
I think what works about AA/NA, for most people, is not having a “higher power” or strictly following the steps (which are not even based on any research), it’s having a community / strong support system, mixed with the introspection required to go through the steps. You don’t have to follow AA so strictly to do that.
You could shop around for AA groups that are more welcoming, or that have even just a few people who are more open minded (not everyone in AA is like that). Maybe try to talk to all sorts of different people to find a sponsor who is either non-religious, or accepting of someone who doesn’t have a higher power.
Or you can skip all that & just try Smart Recovery, which is not religious at all — it’s a much more science/research based recovery program than AA. You can search for meetings in or near your area on the smart recovery website: smartrecovery.org
4 Likes
Thanks! You as well!!!
1 Like
Check out this book, bought it on Amazon, type it in just as you see it. It’s the 12 steps but modified
5 Likes
One more sober atheist here. Went to AA the first three months and it was nice, but not really me. I come here for support and I also go to the addiction psychiatric centre. I did half a year of relapse prevention therapy, and after that I have met regularly with my nurse and a doctor. I have alcohol screening once a month and more comprehensive drug screening every now and then, like… Once a year? Anyway, this sort of individual therapy and conversation together with peer support I get from here works for me I am not really interested in the steps, I mean I’m curious but I don’t need them. I have tools that work for me.
Anyway, sobriety treats me well. I am 640 days sober. Good luck to you too!
14 Likes
For a while I did find some refuge and solace in the least dogmatic, most secular and non 12 step orientated NA group I encountered in Amsterdam, which happens to be the LGBTQ+ group. Just a group of loving people walking the clean and sober road together. The then chairman told me, when I met him on a ferry by coincidence, the only real purpose of the group was to be together and support one another. Suited me fine. I will return there one of these days.
It was also the group with the least serious rituals by far. I liked that too. No 12 steps. No hocus pocus. Just people helping people.
PS. Hi Jenna! @Jennajen 
12 Likes