Welcome to the forum Kyle. I feel you already thought stuff out very well. You need some help. You are asking for it. That’s one. You know you can’t do it alone. You have experience with sobriety. The one thing you need is longevity if I read you right.
One day at a time. It really is that simple. Today we will not drink / use. And we will use all tools we have to achieve that goal. A hard day is just another day where we will not drink. Just for today. Will see about tomorrow when it comes.
For me this group has been my life saver and has been my main peer support group till today. But for many face to face contact with fellows is also of big importance. You won’t feel ashamed there and I’d say go for it! You can have a look at this link if you’re interested in a wide range of support possibilities. Resources for our recovery
Knowledge is power. Wishing you all success in your sober journey Kyle.