Hey there!
I just get the feeling that I can’t do it. I can stay sober for maybe a week and then I relapse and this happens every time. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t feel really motivated and I kind of lost my hope anyway.
Thanks
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Hi Sammy, I think we all felt like that at some point and felt real fear for ourselves. Maybe some of us still do, I do. Take heart that everyone has thought and felt the same. What matters is you try and commit to yourself. Little steps make great strides and once you start to trust yourself then that bond grows and your mountains will seem more manageable.
I believe in you. Check in often, lots of resources here for support and helpful tools.
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If you feel you can’t do it then you won’t. Flip that script in your head and start believing in yourself. You can do it! But you have to put in the hard work every single day.
Tell us what you’ve tried that hasn’t worked and maybe we can brainstorm and come up with another avenue for you to try. For me, I had to surrender to the fact that I couldn’t do it alone and I had to have the willingness to try everything suggested by others.
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I know how it feels, do you go to NA or AA meetings? Do you have enough sober company around you? Do you still hang out with friends or family that aren’t sober either? This all will have a big impact of your capabilities.
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Don’t give up. I know the feeling very well. I was at a point where I couldn’t even string together more than two days before feeling hopeless and giving up. It’s a vicious cycle and only you know how to stop it for yourself. You are not a failure, you just have to figure out what more you need to add to your sober toolbox. I thought I was weak when I’d relapse again and again. But it turns out I needed to add more sober tools. One was joining TS, so I didn’t have to battle this alone. another was to stop feeling ashamed, to be able to look at myself and my faults with loving kindness. And an attitude of problem solving rather than self loathing. Another was holding myself accountable. There is so much more I could say, but really, you CAN do this, and you are NOT alone. Sending you healing and strength. 
After 45 days of being sober I relapsed and it feels so bad.
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Welcome Eddy!
Now you have this forum as a new tool for your sobriety toolbox. It’s no coincidence that those who come here daily to read and interact have long term sobriety. What are some of the other tools you’re using or are willing to use?
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You most certainly can do it. I know many of us on here had pretty much given up on ourselves before we finally quit. And we are no stronger or smarter than you. What are you doing to stay sober? Just wishing and ‘not drinking’ isn’t enough for many of us. I tried quit lit, medication, therapy. this forum, AA, until I found a schedule that fit me. And I am still trying meditation, self help books to keep working on my life so that I never want to escape it with alcohol.
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One day at a time is a common theme you’ll hear around these parts. It sounds cliche but it’s true! If you set your sights on a week it can be daunting. I love this app because it starts out with just 5 minutes, 5 minutes without a drink and you already have achieved something! Then an hour, and so on into a day, three days, and eventually longer. Some of my first days were minute to minute honestly. I counted minutes as victories for myself. Eventually I would make it through the day and my sober time is at 7:30 PM so by the time my day was done I could sit down and be awake when I reached another day sober. It all starts small and builds. The other thing you have to do in my opinion is find your center, what will drive you to choose sobriety everyday? When you find that thing, it becomes the thing you grasp onto when times are tough.
Welcome, Eddy. Sorry you relapsed,but you can get back on track. Like Lisa said, check your sober toolbox. Tweak it and move forward. You can do this, one day at a time!!
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Please keep your hope @sammy_wlk !
We know how tough it can get! I believe in you to stay sober. I just hit my 2 week mark and I’m so glad that I held on. You can do it too!
Much love and blessings!