Starting fresh and learning from past

I’ve been on this journey to sobriety for too long. I’ve had some ok runs- and conistent- but have struggled to go for more than a week. I’ve learned a lot on here and has been motivating, but decided it’s probably best I go to meetings. I’ve never been to one but I’m not the type that get anxious in new or awkward situations. But I feel like I need to put in the work. I found a small church nearby that does them tues/thurs/Friday at 730… I’ve already caught myself trying to make excuses- like the boys (6 & 7) will already be asleep by the time I get home- but I know it’s the right thing and there are other nights.

I have an extremely supportive wife (married this summer after 15 years and 2 kids). I know it’s important to her- she worries about my health with the kids… about a year and a half ago I ended up in the ER with extremely high blood pressure… I felt like I was dying and never going to see my kids again. She has been sober from heroin for 6 years now and almost too understanding and patient with me- probably because she got in trouble in late 2019 and I raised a newborn and 16 month old for 9 months while she was in inpatient rehab. She loved the meetings and still goes back to do therapy there and drug test (nothing is forcing her).

So here is to my fresh start, including in person meetings. I’d tried online but just not for me personally. I also have the AA book in paper and audio- going to make a point to listen or read. Another change- or at least doing consistently- will je reading some verses and getting in the habit of praying again. I actually bought myself a rosary (I’m not catholic- but more as a reminder).

I’ve had an amazing year- I did some awesome things with work and my professional life and got a big promotion. I got married on the beach with my kids present. I was able to help my step son through his first semester of college debt free. But this addiction makes me think how much better that would all be if I was sober the entire time. I think of all the moments and opportunities I’m missing out on. I don’t want my kids to grow up seeing me that way.

So ending this year with a banger and one day at a time. I’ve learned a lot of my triggers (my boys fighting is up there!) but need to fins a coping mechanism like reading or something.

I’m planning on using this thread as journal. I read a lot on here but don’t write a lot.

Hope anyone reading this has a good night/day wherever you are! At least if tomorrow at work sucks it’s due to it being a Monday not from being hungover!

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Thanks for starting your journey openly with us. It sounds like you really know what is involved in recovery, you just need some extra focus and support. Looking forward to bejng in recovery with you.

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Have you tried reading some books about sobriety?

The one that had most impact for me was “The unexpected joy of going sober”

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Good for you for identifying you need additional tools to recover. Find a sponsor and work the steps. Miracles happen my friend. I look forward to reading how your meetings resonate. All meetings are different so if one doesnt “fit” try another until you feel at home.

Good luck

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Thanks for the advice on books- I have been listening to the big book and want to re-listen to the power of now- but suggestion is welcome and I’ll check it out. Also appreciate the advice on meetings- I got to realizing the first place you go may not be a good fit for me.

Day 2 has been good- busy at work with a lot of people taking off for holidays so pretty busy covering for other people. My BP has been really high- not unusual to be dangerously high where I have to take something- but today after work I checked and it was actually normal. Like not even high. Haven’t had that in a while… in the past day 2-5 would be high and I’d have to really watch it. That was really encouraging. Appreciate the kind words/advice and thankful for another sober. Watching my life-long favorite football team and thankful im actually concious and get to really enjoy and remember it. ODAAT

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