Guys, I am starting again today.
I don’t know why I forget everytime to focus on my recovery.
Whenever I get some recovery and body is fine.
I start again
I hope there is a way to overcome this weakness
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Addiction is not a weakness, it’s always there, ready to take control even if you think it’s gone. One day at a time, stay focus, keep coming here and never think that the battle is won. I wish you strength!
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This was my biggest downfall also. Usually after 3 days of being clean id forget how bad it really was and the using thoughts would start up again.
One thing i learned is to play the tape to the end. Meaning to remember how drinking and using makes us feel in the end. The guilt and shame, the finanical debt, the body aches and pains, the emotional turmoil we feel. Remember what drugs and alcohol actually do… which is serve no good purpose for us at all. Everytime i think of using, i play this tape to the end ans then go and do something to distract myself. The cravings do pass. They dont last forever.
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Today is a good day to start 
It’s great your back on your sober journey.
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It’s not weakness you must overcome. You are trying to free yourself from addiction and this shit is hard! Gather your tools, see what additional supports you might need. connect with others in real life and/or here because there is strength in numbers. You are not alone!
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Maybe try a meeting they will help ,helped me stay sober wish you well
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I totally relate!! I actually found it easiest in those first days when I felt like utter shit with withdrawals. But once those started to subside suddenly I forgot just how bad it was and I drank again. Over and over and over.
So this last time I wrote it all down!!
I wrote letters to myself. In those letters I wrote about how badly I felt, physically and emotionally. I also wrote about my hopes for sobriety. Why I wanted to be sober. What I hoped to DO in my sobriety that I wouldn’t be able to do if I continued to drink. And I read those letters any time I started to think “one drink won’t be too bad”.
Reminding myself of it all really helped.
YOU CAN DO IT!!
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I’m a big forgetter. In a few months, visions of happy times with alcohol resurface, omitting all the vomit and wasted time and self-loathing. So I have to keep close to keep it real. Welcome home!
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Welcome back. Everyday is day 1 is what I try and go by and has helped me.
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The merry go round is what I used to call it.
Have a few drinks. Get smashed. Bad hangover. Regret drinking and decide you won’t drink.
Feel fine by following afternoon. Have a few drinks. Get smashed etc.
Then decide you’ll actually quit. Go a few days. Decide your actually strong enough to moderate or that it wasn’t so bad. Have a few drinks. Get smashed. Regret drinking. Do it all over again and again.
I did that for a long time. You’re not alone. Heaps of great info here. Good luck!
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