I have never posted anything like this before, and to be honest, I feel a little bit silly in doing so. But here goes…
Today I intend to stay sober…
I managed just shy of 3 months sober last autumn (fall to my American friends!). I felt good. Really good! I’ve no idea where the willpower came from. I started drinking just small amounts again, and it soon crept back up to a daily habit like it was before. And now here I am, starting about my 10th “Day One” of 2024.
I feel like if I don’t post something here, actually put something in writing, put my intention out there, somewhere, anywhere, I won’t stay sober. So I’ll try it. I will be sober today. And I’ll worry about tomorrow when I get there. Wish me luck I guess?
I’ll be losing myself in my gardening most of the day so hopefully that focuses my mind on other things. It feels like the first day of spring here in Northern England, and that always makes me feel a bit more hopeful . So here I go…🪻:herb:
Good luck Jimmy. It’s nice seeing you back on this site. Use all the resources, you can do it! Manchester looked hairy weather yesterday on TV… Spring is happening here too in London.
Im not far from you Jimmy just up at Durham…i rekon you can do this just dont try and do it on your own…we are here to support you so if you feel like your struggling at any point then come here BEFORE youd pick up and we will help you, dont leave it in the hands of “luck”
Jim, James, Jimmy…great name whichever you prefer. Thanks so much for what you just said. I agree with absolutely all of it. At Christmas did you seek any additional help, or make any particular changes other than the obvious stopping drinking?
That’s really wonderful of you. Thank you. A lot.
And funnily enough I was working up in Durham just last week. I love it there! I’ll keep active on here as and when I can. I figured if I just get through one day, I’ll be more motivated to make it two, then three and so on and so on. If I did 3 months sober, surely I can do it again and keep going and going.
Of course you can!! One day at a time is the way to do it in the beginning if not the whole time…try to work on the reasons for your drinking…the real root causes…actually write them down and start working on them…have u read allen carrs easy way to quit drinking? That changed my mindset on drinking forever…i listened to it instead of reading it, also i found the Stutz documentary on Netflix helpful too…im really glad you made a post because i really believe that a big part of recovery is asking for help and allowing yourself to be helped so please never feel silly for doing so its a big and very necessary step imo
Welcome back @Jimmy99. You know, you don’t need luck really. Or that much willpower either. You need a Plan. @Tragicfarinelli already posted about that for you.
The absolute no.1 thing for me is to not go it alone. Going it alone is what made me a miserable addict in the first place. We need each other. To learn from each other, to remind each other of what and where we were, to NOT go it alone. We’re in this together and I’m glad you’re here.
Thank you for being so sweet to me. I ain’t sure I deserve it! Haha. Either way, nope, not a clue Allen Carr’s book but I’ll start listening today too. (I assume it’s not the camp comedian Allen carr, as I don’t think I could take it seriously!). And I’ll look up the netflix show too. I think I saw the trailer when it came out and never got round to watching it.
no not that Allen Carr but i think thatd be brilliant if it was…its a little repetitive but stay with it because so much of it will ring true for you i think…it literally changed my life. Of course im going to be sweet to you why wouldnt i…your a fellow addict worthy of a better life my friend…thinking we dont deserve kindness is part of the addiction mindset not the recovery one so less of it lol
Not a ramble at all James…I asked anyway didn’t I? These seem like really good resources and really good places to start. I know the Nigel Jones book, and I’ll look the others up definitely. There is a journal function on Sober Time isn’t there? I sort of half heartedly did it last time I sobered up, so I’ll be sure to make a more concerted effort this time around.
I’m based in the leafy hills outside of Manchester, England. I’m sure there’ll be meetings around here but I’m not convinced I’m ever likely to go to one if I am absolutely honest. Maybe I’ll change my mind in time.
Also, stopping going to the pub is a big one for me. I go 3/4 times a week and tell myself it’s purely for the social aspect. That element of talking about our days together, and unloading what’s been going on has undoubtedly been therapy for me over the past few years. Last time I sobered up I just stopped the booze aspect of it, but still went the pub, albeit less often. I think I’ll have to stop completely with that too for now. I had no issue telling everyone in there I’d stopped drinking.
Hi from Scotland weather not bad here im a keen gardener grow everything from seed good for the old mental health , yea try to get to a meeting will make things easier wish you well
Glad you are setting it out there and looking for new ways to make it stick. I will add my positive experience with quit lit to the others as well. Allen Carr’s book and Annie Grace’s, This Naked Mind were both really helpful for me. So were Caroline Knapp’s, Drinking A Love Story and Nancy Carr’s, Last Call. Reading was healing for me. As was gardening, nothing like losing yourself in digging in the dirt.
Also as others have said, keeping the focus on the day at hand really helps me stay grounded and stay right here, right now. I know I can be sober right this minute, and that helps keep my mind from spinning out.
You might also look for some meetings, they help a lot of people immensely.
Hey Jimmy that’s exactly me. I just can’t get a running start with my sobriety . Again I’m starting over but with a morning post- pledging to stay clean just for today . God bless, my friend. We are not alone in this battle.
Spring is a beautiful time to start a new sober life, as everything else around is showing new buds and flowers. This type of change is wonderful.
I used the spring rebirth and plenty of outside support to get me going right and keep me on track in early sobriety.
That’s really cool Ray! I’ve sewn a few things today, but the gardening today was mostly the unglamorous stuff that just NEEDS doing. Jetwashing patios, repainting raised bed etc etc. but yes I try to grown as much from seed and bulb as is possible. Where in Scotland are you? I’m driving up to Alloa and Dumfries tomorrow!
🪻:herb:
no not that Allen Carr but i think thatd be brilliant if it was…its a little repetitive but stay with it because so much of it will ring true for you i think…it literally changed my life. Of course im going to be sweet to you why wouldnt i…your a fellow addict worthy of a better life my friend…thinking we dont deserve kindness is part of the addiction mindset not the recovery one so less of it lol 
