I travel a lot for work I’m only 4 months clean and I find it difficult. I go to meeting but since I’m only visiting for a short time it hard to make friends as a male adult . I’m in hotels a lot sometimes I’m not so sober friendly places. I don’t have many friends since I have transitioned from high life to sober . I work alone. And I feel alone. I meet people in other places, but it’s just difficult when I get in my head. Does any one else travel while trying to keep their recovery first . I mean I find it hard to find someone who will sponsor me since I can’t be in person most of the time.
Welcome @Odylock glad you found us. I know how frequent travel can be lonely but dont travel for work anymore. I just wanted to pop in and tell you that you arent alone in this fight.
Reading/interacting with this community regularly, AA, and therapy have helped me with addiction.
I have to travel several times a year for my job I’m newly sober and will travel for work in 3 weeks to Uzbekistan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan and also a bit nervous about it. I’m able to bring a friend with me and think that will help me at least for my first trip sober. I am unable to attend any sort of meetings in person because of where I live but have found that using this app daily helps me keep focused. I’ve seen on here some others talk about having a sponsor online. Maybe you can find a sponsor online or attend online meetings while you travel? One of the things I’m worried about with travel is I don’t always have regular internet access. I know when I will travel alone I definitely will want internet access to be able to look in on this group but that’s not always possible with the places I travel to.
I don’t travel, but i am at home a lot by myself. Ironically, our topic in my AA meeting today was how lonely we get and how some of us have gotten comfortable being lonely. I think it’s good that you don’t prefer it. I offer it after being in an abusive marriage for 27 years because i lost all my friends and he distanced my family. I haven’t had any friends for 27 years and find that i am me comfortable alone than in anyone’s company.
I understand you’re alone a lot. Have you consternation a Facebook sobriety group? Some have live chats. I’ve found a few i rant like without and BS.
Not traveling for work myself but understand the loneliness. It triggers cravings for me too.
For me it helps to keep me busy. Maybe you can go out for a walk ore work out somewhere?
Maybe join a online meeting ore listen to a recovery podcast?
Here you find online meetings if you are interested: Online meeting resources
Hey Cody
Yep, I travel regularly too and it was one of the major contributors to my drinking spiralling.
There were a few reasons for this -
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I still believed that alcohol was a “treat” so the allure of almost always free alcohol was a real temptation.
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I encountered alcohol much more frequently when travelling than I did in my normal home life. This is especially true when entertaining clients or bonding with overseas colleagues.
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I got bored and lonely.
I’m sure there are more, but these three were key for me to address. What have I done so far?
→ Joined TS and come here if I need support ! First line of defence.
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Immersed myself in information about alcohol. This was key in changing my mindset from it being a treat to it being a poison. “this naked mind” was the book that finally helped that understanding click but Andrew Huberman’s podcasts on the subject were useful too.
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Work in progress BUT I have done a few things. I have made a note on my frequent flyer accounts that I don’t drink so I’m not often offered alcohol now on board. If possible I choose to stay in a hotel which doesn’t have a minibar in room. I have had to be inventive with asking colleagues to do things other than go to a bar. Most are pleased with this! The client aspect is still a big problem which I’m currently working on. For now I am essentially ignoring those clients who drink a lot OR I bring a colleague who likes alcohol and make it a bigger meeting. I try and see clients who drink earlier in the week as it is easier not to be drinking on a Monday or Tuesday than a Friday lunchtime… I also avoid alcohol driven networking events. I don’t like networking events anyway, now I just refuse to go if I know they’re in a bar. I’m senior enough that it doesn’t much matter to my career.
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I take gym stuff everywhere and only book hotels with gym facilities. After a long day I go and work out, shower and change and am the last person to show up for dinner so I skip any pre drinks. If I am not socialising I make sure to bring a book, stock my iPad with movies, go out with a camera, bring my to-do list… anything to keep occupied.
If all else fails… I join the AA 24 hour international marathon meeting online.
Good luck!
Whenever I travel, for work or pleasure, I find local AA meetings and the contact info. Some intergroups or districts will help with someone to meet you at the hotel and take you to a meeting, and in any case, a new face at a local meeting is always warmly greeted.
Friends in AA and a working relationship with my higher power manifested in the people around me means I am never truly alone. I can choose to pity myself or to get into action. I was stunned to hear that going to an AA meeting is a spiritual action. I didn’t know how to take action on spirituality. My daily time of reflection and reading, attendance at AA and interaction on Talking Sober are the pillars of my spiritual activity today.
I would seriously consider finding a new job. Recovery coming first means it has to come first in order to work. That definitely sounds hard and painful and stressful. Maybe your company/boss has a position you can apply for in order to stay put somewhere for a little while? Just until you get your bearings and can meet a good sponsor and make some good friends you know. Then when you’re out on the road you’ll have them to call until you come back to your home base again. I have been at meetings where one of our members was a trucker and we would put him on speaker phone in order for him to hear our voices, and be a part of the meeting. There are so many ways to finding a solution to problems, the more sober people you ask the more solutions you find. I hope this helps. Also try the meeting guide meeting finder app on the play store. It’s free. There’s a little blue chair as the icon. Saves my life like daily.
I recently had my first work trip since stopping drinking. It was rough but I decided I could indulge in as much brain candy as I wanted. I stayed up late reading a stupid detective novel and found I enjoyed walking around the city in the evening more when I wasn’t focused on where to pop in for a drink and which restaurant looked like it would be best when I was drunk later.
Good luck!