I travel a lot for work I’m only 4 months clean and I find it difficult. I go to meeting but since I’m only visiting for a short time it hard to make friends as a male adult . I’m in hotels a lot sometimes I’m not so sober friendly places. I don’t have many friends since I have transitioned from high life to sober . I work alone. And I feel alone. I meet people in other places, but it’s just difficult when I get in my head. Does any one else travel while trying to keep their recovery first . I mean I find it hard to find someone who will sponsor me since I can’t be in person most of the time.
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Welcome @Odylock glad you found us. I know how frequent travel can be lonely but dont travel for work anymore. I just wanted to pop in and tell you that you arent alone in this fight.
Reading/interacting with this community regularly, AA, and therapy have helped me with addiction.
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I have to travel several times a year for my job I’m newly sober and will travel for work in 3 weeks to Uzbekistan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan and also a bit nervous about it. I’m able to bring a friend with me and think that will help me at least for my first trip sober. I am unable to attend any sort of meetings in person because of where I live but have found that using this app daily helps me keep focused. I’ve seen on here some others talk about having a sponsor online. Maybe you can find a sponsor online or attend online meetings while you travel? One of the things I’m worried about with travel is I don’t always have regular internet access. I know when I will travel alone I definitely will want internet access to be able to look in on this group but that’s not always possible with the places I travel to.
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I don’t travel, but i am at home a lot by myself. Ironically, our topic in my AA meeting today was how lonely we get and how some of us have gotten comfortable being lonely. I think it’s good that you don’t prefer it. I offer it after being in an abusive marriage for 27 years because i lost all my friends and he distanced my family. I haven’t had any friends for 27 years and find that i am me comfortable alone than in anyone’s company.
I understand you’re alone a lot. Have you consternation a Facebook sobriety group? Some have live chats. I’ve found a few i rant like without and BS.
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Not traveling for work myself but understand the loneliness. It triggers cravings for me too.
For me it helps to keep me busy. Maybe you can go out for a walk ore work out somewhere?
Maybe join a online meeting ore listen to a recovery podcast?
Here you find online meetings if you are interested: Online meeting resources
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Hey Cody
Yep, I travel regularly too and it was one of the major contributors to my drinking spiralling.
There were a few reasons for this -
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I still believed that alcohol was a “treat” so the allure of almost always free alcohol was a real temptation.
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I encountered alcohol much more frequently when travelling than I did in my normal home life. This is especially true when entertaining clients or bonding with overseas colleagues.
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I got bored and lonely.
I’m sure there are more, but these three were key for me to address. What have I done so far?
→ Joined TS and come here if I need support ! First line of defence.
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Immersed myself in information about alcohol. This was key in changing my mindset from it being a treat to it being a poison. “this naked mind” was the book that finally helped that understanding click but Andrew Huberman’s podcasts on the subject were useful too.
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Work in progress BUT I have done a few things. I have made a note on my frequent flyer accounts that I don’t drink so I’m not often offered alcohol now on board. If possible I choose to stay in a hotel which doesn’t have a minibar in room. I have had to be inventive with asking colleagues to do things other than go to a bar. Most are pleased with this! The client aspect is still a big problem which I’m currently working on. For now I am essentially ignoring those clients who drink a lot OR I bring a colleague who likes alcohol and make it a bigger meeting. I try and see clients who drink earlier in the week as it is easier not to be drinking on a Monday or Tuesday than a Friday lunchtime… I also avoid alcohol driven networking events. I don’t like networking events anyway, now I just refuse to go if I know they’re in a bar. I’m senior enough that it doesn’t much matter to my career.
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I take gym stuff everywhere and only book hotels with gym facilities. After a long day I go and work out, shower and change and am the last person to show up for dinner so I skip any pre drinks. If I am not socialising I make sure to bring a book, stock my iPad with movies, go out with a camera, bring my to-do list… anything to keep occupied.
If all else fails… I join the AA 24 hour international marathon meeting online.
Good luck!
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Whenever I travel, for work or pleasure, I find local AA meetings and the contact info. Some intergroups or districts will help with someone to meet you at the hotel and take you to a meeting, and in any case, a new face at a local meeting is always warmly greeted.
Friends in AA and a working relationship with my higher power manifested in the people around me means I am never truly alone. I can choose to pity myself or to get into action. I was stunned to hear that going to an AA meeting is a spiritual action. I didn’t know how to take action on spirituality. My daily time of reflection and reading, attendance at AA and interaction on Talking Sober are the pillars of my spiritual activity today.
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I would seriously consider finding a new job. Recovery coming first means it has to come first in order to work. That definitely sounds hard and painful and stressful. Maybe your company/boss has a position you can apply for in order to stay put somewhere for a little while? Just until you get your bearings and can meet a good sponsor and make some good friends you know. Then when you’re out on the road you’ll have them to call until you come back to your home base again. I have been at meetings where one of our members was a trucker and we would put him on speaker phone in order for him to hear our voices, and be a part of the meeting. There are so many ways to finding a solution to problems, the more sober people you ask the more solutions you find. I hope this helps. Also try the meeting guide meeting finder app on the play store. It’s free. There’s a little blue chair as the icon. Saves my life like daily.
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I recently had my first work trip since stopping drinking. It was rough but I decided I could indulge in as much brain candy as I wanted. I stayed up late reading a stupid detective novel and found I enjoyed walking around the city in the evening more when I wasn’t focused on where to pop in for a drink and which restaurant looked like it would be best when I was drunk later.
Good luck!
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