I blacked out on Saturday and don’t remember getting home. Feeling much better physically but still paranoid that my apartment building has me on camera doing something wrong, I’ll get a police summons in the mail, etc. I don’t miss this part of drinking at all. It’s been a long time. I know it’ll blow over but it makes a hangover turn into weeks…
I know I’m lucky I made it back in one piece, credit cards and phone are okay, I’m physically okay. Feel incredibly guilty. Told all this to my therapist and she didn’t have much encouragement lol…
I think try and get things into perspective…if ud done something seriously wrong you would have known about it by now…its horrible when u dont remember and think the worst ive been there many times but chances are this really is just paranoia, try and be kind to yourself while this runs its course
It’s scary. I had three hours blackout last week. My apartment in chaos, things destroyed, blood on the walls, pain and injuries, then vomited and went to hospital. My nose hurt for days. And my arm. t’s isn’t the first time I blacked out. It’s scary because I could’ve fallen on my neck and died or become disabled. I’m glad I already am on the waiting list of a good rehab
@Apotheosis and @Dreams
You are at a good site for support while you stop your drug of choice. You both have good reasons to not want to drink.
You each had common reactions to drinking. Nothing changes unless something changes.
Look into what you personally have to do to get support while you go through the physical process of withdrawal.
It varies for each individual.
Some can do it on their own, others need medical and/ or a rehab place.
I see that you have stopped drinking. Congratulations on all the days that you have so far. @Apotheosis
I may be able to do it alone but to be sure and to be faster I will take the help I can get. Rehab is in a few months, until then I have three meetings a week, every two weeks I see psychologist, every week I have a drug counselor and a social worker both once a week. Sometimes getting clean feels a lot like trying not to die, which it is obviously. I always thought blackouts were horrible and I didn’t understand why people would keep drinking until that point. I thought I was better off with my drugs but that was a big illusion which I’m just slowly waking up from
Yeah I don’t get why I blacked out but it’s never intentional. My brain screams for more drinks until I get so stupid I can’t function. I’ve always been this way even in college. So I made rules like beer only but that flies out the window after a few. So I just don’t partake.
I fooled myself into thinking I could. Life is better without it. Sounds like you’re on a good path. Be honest with those people and yourself.