That was me when I was drinking. I had to play damage control the next morning. Who did I text. Who did I flirt with, who did I yell at…
If you have lived that way for a long time it’s going to take time to become normal again. I use the term normal loosely in my case lol
I’m waking up this old thread from over a year ago because this is happening again. I remembered posting something like this, and wanted to read through it again. I have this deep underlying dread and shame. It’s pulling me down.
I just started reading “Radical Acceptance” last night, of course at the suggestion of someone here. I still have “Codependent No More” chillin’ in my kindle. It’s third in line. I made a promise to myself this week to put the phone down and the TV off for at least an hour each night to read.
I have intake for therapy next Tuesday. It’s hard to feel hope right now, so I have to go with my brain and logic. This feeling is temporary and I will get through it.
It’s just so strange to live in a constant state of shame. I just don’t understand why I’m filled with so much dread and shame. Sigh. 