Stressed. Want to drink to forget, but I know that drinking will only make it worse. My therapy session starts in 7 minutes and I don’t feel like talking or exploring my problems. I just want to move on with my life. Not really sure what to do. Just want to be numb.
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I’m sorry ur feeling so stressed. I can relate to the stressed/overwhelmed feeling and just wanting to forget it all. As much as we think drugs and alcohol do this… they truly don’t. Temporarily, sure, they numb any feeling that we don’t like, but then we are a slave to them and our life begins to revolve around them. I used to want to fix myself with drugs. I didn’t like feeling one way do I’d use to “fix” it, I didn’t like feeling another way and id use to “fix” that. Anything to male me feel somewhat ok with myself. Honestly tho… what u wrote here is soo powerful.
I hear u wanting to move on with life. The thing is tho, the only way to move on with life is to work thru it. Work thru the stress, the pain, and uncomfortable feeling. Addiction/alcoholism is being stuck. Stuck in the same routine of feeling and numbing thru substances. The true freedom is being clean and sober. Not being a slave to anything. It takes time. Give urself a chance to see what recovery is like 
I hope ur therapy session goes well today!
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In the beginning, emotions are scary. Dealing with them…even scarier. You dont have to deal with everything. It takes time. Easiest way to walk a mile…putting one foot infront of the stationary one.
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