Struggling in sobriety

Hey fellas. 6 months 17 days. Glad im clean finally. Im 24 and its been a long road. Just absolutely havnt been able to show up for myself as of late. Been in bed for a week or even longer id say idk im not counting. Only getting up to eat (depression eating) and showering. Just feel in a rut and everyone in my familys against me etc. I know this isnt true but my brain seems to just “believe” it and have lacked the discipline to do what i need to do…ie exercise or get outside and just push through. Glad i found this part in the app. Never bothered to even explore the app and found something great. Cant wait to get out if this rut. So much i want to just vent but dont want to drag it on as i want people to actually read this and hopefully engage with me. Thanks for your time and reading this.


Welcome Gorka!! :smiley:

6 months is an amazing beginning!! I plan on being in this space soon. I only have 10 days in. I’m new to all of this and even though I don’t have much to say to help you, I know sometimes we just have to do the best we can for ourselves in the moment. So if that’s laying in bed, do just that and allow yourself the grace for that to be enough. Tomorrow is another day and maybe, just maybe you will be able to do more.
Hope to see you here everyday and keep up the great work!! :smiley:


Thank you. Nice congrats on the 10 days that is a big big step! One day at a time. Thats okay a chat even helps i appreciate the time you took to reply. Thanks thats actually some really sound advice! I can be too hard on myself. I expect alot out of myself. So i appreciate that crucial reminder. Ill be here alot more ive found this part of the app. You too keep going one day at a time. Its not a race its a marathon…


Hi congrats on your sober time. I am 4 months tomorrrow and feeling in a similar situation. Couldn’t get off the couch all day yesterday and watched shit tv and had a nap even though I wasn’t tired so I could escape. Been ignoring all my family sending me messages, and some days can’t even bring myself to do the daily phone call to my sponsor.
Trying to remember the positives and that at least I am not drinking. This phase is not forever. Sending you strength.


Thanks. You to comgrats on being 4 months tomorrow that is massive!!. Yeah hey i been napping like crazy just to forget it all. Avoiding the people that care not keeping up the appreances. Im so thankful they are patient or idk where id be i really needed that from them. Ive been scrolling youtube and facebook watching stupid things. Recently got back into a hobby i love which was reading non fiction books. Have enjoyed it. Defiently a random intense fixation to it and then it slowly drops off and i stop doing that too. Same hey just thinking how glad i am im not using that is a massive win on its own. The sun sets and it rises i will get up eventually. Sending you strength man you got this too. Your heading in the right direction by abstaining and thats going to lead to benifits and growth. Sending strength hope you get it and can feel okay and good enough to push forward.


Firstly, congratulations on your six months and seventeen days of staying clean. That’s a significant achievement, and you should be proud of yourself for taking this step towards a healthier life. Feeling stuck in a rut is something many of us can relate to, especially when dealing with depression and negative thought patterns. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. It’s okay to struggle, and it’s okay to reach out for help. Take things one step at a time. Start with small goals, like getting outside for a short walk or doing a quick exercise routine. These little victories can gradually build momentum and help you regain a sense of control and accomplishment.
And remember, your family may not always understand what you’re going through, but it might not mean they’re against you. Communication can be key in bridging that gap. Opening about your struggles with someone you trust can lighten the burden.
Keep moving forward, one day at a time. You’ve already come so far, and there’s a whole community here rooting for you. We’re here to listen, support, and encourage each other every step of the way. You’ve got this! :muscle:t3:


Thank you. I am proud of it. I even knew the first time i used it was to escape and i didnt like that but i couldnt stop because of how i felt. Glad ive finally been able to break free from the chains. I really appreciate the kind words and great advice. I have a really supportive family thankfully, i guess my insecurities make me feel like they are attacking me and picking my flaws apart when in reality they are worried and come from a place of caring. My whole family basically struggles with addiction and my mums 5 years clean and i live with her so i am thankful there. I dont really communicate with her as its a touchy and emotional for me to get personal with her because i know she hurts to see me like this and express my mind and struggles and i hate for her to see me like this. She truly is amazing. Again thank you so much :pray:t2: youve got this aswell thank you for your time and comment its moving and motivational.


I’ll have 6 months on June 4. I went into an inpatient rehab facility on Dec.4, when I got home I felt the same way. I was in culture shock being outside the safety of those walls. I was a hardcore drug addict for 15 years, half my life. Anyhow, my best advice is to take one day at a time. Our lives have to completely change to get used to living sober. Our worst day sober is still better than our best day high. At this time I am living my best life. I’ve rebuilt my relationships with my family and found joy in the things I did before I got strung out. I hope things get better for you. Hang in there!!


Oh man I really hate my depression-naps, when I had them I often thought “why do I get sober if I just nap and lay around” Well I do exercise regularly so that helped me to also get in the habit of taking a walk more. But Im unemployed and exercising and walking all day becomes a routine too, which sometimes bores me so that I do depression naps. So I’m trying to look for work but not so much work that I get pressure because stress also triggers cravings.

Idk, if have these depressive episodes, I try to see if it goes more than two days, then I need to get active and talk to someone I trust or at least do something that makes my sobriety worth it. I’m 38 days now so very early, and I just want to keep going right now. So if I nap, okay, still way better than using. But hopefully someday I’ll have an active lifestyle that doesn’t involve these depressive laying around times cause that seriously messes with me.

Still even when I didn’t do nothing all day, just watched Netflix or something but was sober, that is a win for me baby! And congrats on 6, nearly 7 months!


Wow congratulations!! I remember when i wnt to rehab i looked upto the people getting thier 6 months. Cant wait till you get there its a good feeling!. Yep i can so relate to that rehab was a safe space and you could proccess your issues with others and they had to process it with you. On the outside obviously you get people who dont give hoot and you cant make them follow the rehab structure :rofl:. Wow congratulations im so happy to hear that. Keep hope. My mum was an addict for 18 years of my life i NEVER thought id see here clean yet she has been for awhile now. Your sobriety reminds me of that and i cant help but smile when i think of that. Congratulations. I cant wait for the rewards of my hard work and rebuild those relationships. Im glad to hear youve rebuilt yours and your going in a good direction. Thank you for sharing. I appreciate


Hey man. Thanks for the reply and sharing. Ive been feeling that way and having those thoughts too. Not much has really changed since getting sober except being sober. So those thoughts pop up. Ironically enough sleep is my favourite thing as im not consciously awake and feeling shit etc…but i hate waking up to realise ive had a dream about a ex im trying to get over or moments in my life that bought me extreme happiness and connection with people. I must get out and exercise when i was kid i played soccer for clubs for years most my life. I did my acl and mcl and havnt been able to play and that defiently hasnt helped my depression at all. Soccer was my life. Yeah im unemployed too atm…been knocked back from a few places, put alot of effort into applying for places, signing upto job providers and still nothing. Its draining and does hurt me when i get declined. Thats a actually a really good tip man…i should just pace myself and not try get a job thatll over load on me as my stress will lead to cravings. I really feel sobriety is about putting yourself first and that is defiently one way of doing it. Best of luck and i hope you do find something thatd be cool and hopefully keep you busy and be able to go enjoy some nice things. 38 days man well done super proud of you keep going. I remember my first 30 days that was an awesome feeling. And your absolutely right its still better than using anything is. You have a great mindset to really go far into sobriety. Youll get there man just keep chipoing away at it and itll come habit. The depression lay arounds mess with me too. I was told (and i could be wrong as i am only 6mnths) that these things happen throughout your whole life through sobriety but its about learning coping mechanisms and things you know works so when these moments come up your prepared for them and go through the storm and come out unharmed and not using. Aha great win mate love it!! I try watch things i enjoy i do enjoy watching movies so thats a good way to distract. Keep going man well done on getting sober your stronger than you know

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Ah so your ACL and Mcl are torn or what exactly do you mean? Will it heal? If not I hope you find some good exercise that suits you I’m no sport expert so I don’t know what fits best in that case. But no matter what, starting small is always better than not starting at all and as you have much soccer experience you know how rewarding that is!

Thank you mate for your kind words, being proud of me. Yea it was stupid hard some days the last weeks, so many cravings but for now they’re gone since two days. Without exercise I would have relapsed long ago for sure. The first three weeks I actually didn’t intend to stay clean this long. But now my mind changes toward actually craving sobriety and freedom again. Getting into swimming helps, cause going to the gym is already a habit, but swimming is something I have to force myself. I often get racing heart even before I arrive at the swimming pool​:joy::joy: but that keeps me sane and sober, partly because I know that swimming as a sport and drugs are not compatible; I have to choose. I did 92 days sober last year and that was so amazing. But I didn’t swim back then.

What I’ve heard is that the first two years of sobriety people will experience post acute withdrawal symptoms, and even if not: 6 months after (I guess in your case) years of using means that your brain is still healing and I’m sure I’ll have my hard moments in 6 months too. But now you actually have the clear head and time to do the things that are good for you. I mean you already did the hardest thing: staying clean. I like many people on here wish so strongly to get where you are, and you know you’ve done something strong. So I’m sure you’ll get into an active lifestyle as well.

When I’m depressed I often do just four to six pushups or walk around the block and start with that. In most cases I then do more pushups or walk even longer walks. But even if not that’s a small win for me.

Btw you good some good movies you can recommend me? I’m sometimes searching for good shows and movies but feel like I’ve already watched all good things and everything else just seems boring xd

And yea that thing with finding a Minijob before going full time was a tip from my social worker, I’m in two programs with social workers who specialize in helping addicted people get a stable life

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Ah right its the ligaments in your knee that play a crucial part in your leg not dislocating when you pivot. Sadly my knee not having that anymore i cant play any sport that reauires me to change my direction suddenly and fast. It wont heal unless i get surgery as theres a lack of blood flow in the knee cap area so sadly it doesnt heal on its own. Its very exspensive procedure and keeps you out for upto 9 months before running can happen again. Most acl reconstructions result in another acl tear aswell so is it worth it. I defiently need to weigh my options up with this one. Cheers man well yeah i can still walk and jog in straight lines and what not so i can still do that. Thats all right bro glad those craving subsided and you able to push through them. Wow thats crazy!!! Damn your strong for being able to just keep going with how you were not intending to stay clean. When we get a glimps of sobriety we know its good for us and we feel better way better than when were in addiction. Haha. For abit there i use to go to the pools and sauna and steam room was amazing i felt refreshed everytime. Id go in there and then jump in the cold when im hot do a few laps. I dont like crowds so i was always super nervous and my anxiety peaked. But i just try tell myself im alright and overthinking things.yeah thanks man i can feel myself building upto it and i know its coming i just got to make that leap and go for it. I know i have a drive and can comitt to things and just keep going and i like running and working out etc because of the years of soccer. Thats so true right!! You start with 6 pushups and its even hard to get to the point where your going to actually do that but you realise when your doing it your motivated and do more and get more in. One of my favourite things ive learnt is…humans arnt born with a motivation chemical etc in them motivation is a reward from doing something or starting something. If you look at the dishes and wait to get motivated it wont happen. Get in there and just say youll do 5 bits of dishes and suddenly youll find your motivated and have done the whole lot aha. Um i got a few yeah…idk what your into but a few ill just hit you with…i love south park. Haunting of hill house on netflix. Dirk gentley and the holistic detective agency. West memphis 3. Guardians of the galaxies. Thor love and thunder, Her with jaquoan fenix or however its spelt. Pain and gain, zodiac, rick and morty, the big short, black mass, django, catch me if you can, good will hunting, the passion of the christ, the talented mr ripley, slumdog millionair. Basically those should help you on catogorys aswell and be able to explore and find other good ones. I will warn you though haunting off hill house does have scenes where the (and sorry for ruining this but i feel obligated to mention it) boy turns into an addict. From memory there is no drug scenes itself but you see him struggle and steal things etc and ask for money and what not just very addict behaviour and parts where hes “high” etc. Also some of them are moving movies and evoke strong emotions so im not sure and would hate to reccomend anything that could trigger you. Damn thats really cool i wish i coulf find one of those where i am. They seem to be robotic where i am and only filling seats so they have a job. If you find a good one and they care and help stick with them lol.

Congratulations on your 6 months and I guess 18 days by now! That is a massive achievement. I’m glad you found the community part of this app - it is a great help.

Depression is not unheard of after getting sober. For a long long time your body relied on chemical reactions from booze or drugs to satisfy your reward centre in the brain. You don’t do that anymore, you’ve probably overcome the most acute cravings by now, but still… something is missing, isn’t it?

Now you have to relearn to get your happiness from the small, everyday things. And what better way than to share with us? Go back to a hobby you used to enjoy before addiction. There is probably a thread on here already, from music to swimming, photography, cooking, knitting, gardening and houseplants, pets, reading, bikes, diy projects, running and gym … share with us what you’re doing and feel the pleasure again of doing it.

Use the check-in thread to share your day counter and just talk about your day - venting allowed.

Welcome to the family, hope to see you around.

Oh I hope you find some way of affording surgery maybe there is some kind of health care where you live.

And your motivation part is totally on point. I think that’s what kept me in bed for hours, cause I thought “I’ll wait until I’m motivated enough to get up” and of course that didn’t happen I had to do it.
That’s kinda like addiction: I used for long periods and always thought “I’ll quit tomorrow or in two days when I’m motivated enough” but that didn’t happen just by itself mostly I had to at least make the mental effort of choosing sobriety and only then the motivation to get clean even longer came to me.

Yo I love sauna I go 2-3 times a week. You could even say, that I exist because of saunas, because my parents met each other in one (they were working there haha) and I was already in my mother’s womb in the sauna. I’m sure if you don’t have the energy to exercise or walk, you’ll find some energy for sauna :wink: it’s so relaxing you know you’ll feel better. And cold water is so freaking healthy it always gives a burst of energy so maybe that helps.

Thanks for trigger warning, I don’t mind drug scenes, I just get scared from horror movies that’s it😂 what a coincidence I was thinking of watching south park again the last few days and listen daily to a remix of the intro on repeat (if you like techno music the song is called CQNZR - south park) and watched the first 25 minutes of pain and gain a week ago to get myself motivated for sobriety and fitness. You know the scene where mark Wahlberg’s telling his friend in the gym something along the lines of: we look like gods, we should earn like gods. (Maybe they didn’t use the word gods I don’t remember) And I thought, I am part of God, I deserve to live that way (meaning sober)

Well thanks I’m gonna look into these movies for sure I need more stuff to watch

And yea, I get that anxiety part, but you’re also right, you’re alright and overthinking it. Well, I’m gonna go wake up now get going today is my day 40 already, can’t believe I actually got so far again :grin::v: