I’m trying to keep myself clean and make my sobriety the first priority. Ive never had a problem with giving it up for the first couple months. But when I feel like i’m over the hump, i pick right back up where I left off. I get to a point where there is nothing stopping me and i dont even think about calling anyone and asking for help. Its just straight to getting my fix. Which just ends up being a downhill spiral from there. Im killing myself and the people who mean the most to me. I have found one mens group that i actually feel like i belong im a shy person and dont like feeling like im being judge and that ill say something that will make me sound dumb. Ive never been one for sharing. All the other groups just make me feel uncomfortable. Im struggling to find a sponsor because i get uneasy going to talk to people. I just want some thoughts and help on how and where i should go from here. Whats work the best for your sobriety
Hey! I totally get what you’re saying- I haven’t found much luck with meetings either. However, I can relate to you. It’s really easy to go a few months and then think everything is fine but why don’t you put into perspective that maybe everything is so fine because you’re sober…. Maybe consider that you feeling so good and complacent is due to the rewards and benefits of sobriety…. And think of where you are and how you felt when you used and started spiraling… I think that’s the best way for me to stay sober is really doing a daily inventory of all the benefits I have seen… I hope you have a great weekend and please reach out if you need to talk.
Nice honest post. I think it’s key that you’ve found a group that you fit in at. In my experience, it was fine to just observe and speak minimally at first. Notice who you admire. Get their phone numbers and, this was key for me, make a day / time appt to actually call them. That way, it won’t be weird if you have to call bc you are craving or close to relapsing. You can do the same thing here, but for me this addiction business is a subtle foe, and I need irl help. Best of wishes for your sustained sober awesomeness. We’re all in this together here.
Thanks, I really appreciate the words
Just Do it. Once it comes out of your mouth to say the words, “I need your help” or just simply "Help me " let it roll right out of your mouth, that person can and will give you directions and suggestions how the best way is for YOU to ask a person to spincer you. Its works.We ALL start somewhere, so find that moment use it , it’ll be the best thing you will every do for yourself.
@Amelie is right I was going to say the same thing, most newcomers in groups I’ve seen don’t share right away, I’m that weird person who did because I had so much shit kept inside for so long and I finally felt in the company of people I could let it out! That’s the thing about AA groups at least, there’s no judgement that I’ve found because everyone that walks in the door has a problem whether they choose to be there or someone forced them to be there legally.
I met a guy the other day who asked me to sign his court required sheet, that was a funny first for me seeing as how I’ve only been in AA for a couple of weeks 
he had no clue just was looking for a signature so he could check it off.
I met my sponsor at my first meeting, I knew it nearly right away, number one I needed a Yoda to teach me the ways of sobriety lol but I just felt based on our chat after the meeting I needed to grab hold of this guy and get some of what he’s got going on!
Sorry for rambling I guess my point is that I’m no expert and I’ve been sober before on my own, and given the choice I wouldn’t do it that way ever again. Whether it’s here, or AA, or a church group, or just a group of sober friends, or whatever you find is best for you, just cling to it as part of your plan and focus on today 
Wish you the best
It’s actually huge that you found a group you like. Those guys want to help you and they can even introduce to other groups or people you like probably. I like the comment on here that said “just do it.” That’s the honest answer. It’s hard to ask for help or get over the social anxiety at first, but it gets easier and then these things feel normal and eventually being sober feels like normal life. It’s a good feeling. Just do it. Go up and start talking. Get your hand up at that men’s group you like and say anything. Little steps add up
I have never ever ever bennin a place to put my addiction aside. My.recovery from my addictions is priority comes first before anything family home employment children my religious beliefs. My SOBRIETY RECOVERY ITS FIRST in every breath I take every day. OR I cannot exist in the world as a productive member of society and a loving careing member of my family. .