The last couple of days I’ve been having a real hankering for beer. I’ve had quite a few alchohol free ones since I gave up drinking in november, but now I just feel all empty and sad inside. I want the real deal so badly! I feels preposterous, but nevertheless its a powerful feeling.
The most frequent thought I’ve entertained lately is the lie that I could just buy myself a sixpack for the weekend and keep it at that. Back on the wagon afterwards, no harm done…
I know its a big fat lie though. That one sixpack would soon become a every weekend kind of deal, followed by a few every now and then on weeksdays… its a slippery slope and all the sudden Im back to drinking a sixpack everyday after work.
This hankering is still killing me though… its so hard not to just buy into the lies… one beer or one sixpack? Whats the harm in that, right…?
I’ve been feeling the same way lately, similar thought process. I think about the rough mornings and what alcohol has done to me all of these years. I know I can’t stop at just a few and so far I’m holding on strong 25 days.
U already know that ur addict thinking is trying to stir up shit. Those are all lies…
This is the biggest lie tell me… what harm does it cause by drinking? Play the tape to the end and ALL the way to the end… don’t stop at the “good” part. Remember those feelings of guilt and shame and disappointment. Letting urself and others down. Resetting ur timer. The awful physical feeling ull feel afterwards. More $$ being spent on something that does sooo much damage. As @KevinesKay would say… my addiction serves no purpose. The idea that it does is in reality a lie. It does nothing for me. The real good feelings I get are from staying clean and sober. Would u agree to this for urself? Write out ur why’s for quitting. Distract urseld with something fun! A good show or order some food or go for a walk outside. Tell ur addict thinking to “F” off! I literally will say it out loud sometimes. U can get thru this.
I remember being there… i use to hold beer high on a pedestal, a reward, a deserving reward. I viewed it as something i was deprived of instead of what it really was. Alcohol deprived me of a happy, healthy life. My perspective shifted and I’ve been pretty good since. You’re doing the right thing coming here and talking about the struggle. Never struggle alone, our alcoholism wants to isolate us, wants us to lie. Best wishes, we’re here for you.
I hear you. I used to negotiate with myself about “just one sip.” But then I ran the tapes … like you are in your post. One sip leads to one glass leads to one bottle leads to … the misery that had us stop in the first place. One day one minute one second at a time. Hold tight. You can get through this. I’m routing for you.
There are so many great and compassionate responses to this thread already, Im overwhelmed! God bless y’all for kind words of encouragement.
As someone said, its all about the desire to isolate and drink myself silly I suppose. I’m kinda torned about my intentions for drinking. On one hand theres this stupid idea of “a few beer’s, and back on the wagon”- kinda thing. On the other hand some parts of me just want to get on a binge and go to my family’s remote cabin and drink for days…
I’m kind of dystemic/ slightly depressed which explains my sudden loss of mind. I’m not seeing straight!
I know I’ll find it in me to resist this one more time, but I’m highly reserved about the outcome in the long run. To fight battles on and off for a lifetime just seems, well, unappealing…
I’ve always been on the rather philosophical side of the spectra. Questions concerning our existence, the purpose of life etc. These thoughts leads to great joy at times, but they also trigger a heavy mood. At those occasions I used to drink, and excessively at that. Alcohol kept my mind at ease I suppose…
Honestly… I thought this too. To think that I’m going to struggle or have to work this hard to stay clean Every. Single. Day. For the rest of my life seems daunting. But the people before me who have alot of time under their belts show me and tell me that it’s literally only 24 hours at a time. Dont even think beyond that right now cuz that can cause some hesitation to keep sober. Literally just get thru today. And it does get easier. People tell me that it does. They say they still get cravings but they are just fleeting thots and they aren’t as intense or happen as often. Our healthy coping skills become more natural and we don’t have to struggle as much. But it won’t get better if we keep using and drinking. I’ve proven that to myself for the past 22 years lol what do u have planned for tonight instead?Relaxing or a fun activity? A walk?
Fight those demons! Don’t let them allow you to do what you don’t need to do! It’s all mental strength. The first couple days are a struggle but you get past those cravings eventually and you start feeling better about yourself. You’re strong you got this!
I see that you are making it one hour at a time. Way to go! Some days are just harder than others.
Beer has been my worst enemy/best friend for a long time too. And the way people talk about it so casually like drinking beer is no big deal. Grrr.
I find that fizzy water helps me fight those cravings. Little things like push ups and sit ups help too. Or I will go clean sonething.
Been eating a lot of ice cream lately and hot chocolate too. Anything but booze.
You can do it!
tell me… what harm does it cause by drinking? Play the tape to the end and ALL the way to the end… don’t stop at the “good” part. Remember those feelings of guilt and shame and disappointment. Letting urself and others down. Resetting ur timer. The awful physical feeling ull feel afterwards. More $$ being spent on something that does sooo much damage. As 