There is a line from an old U2 song that always stuck with me…
‘Nothing changes on New Years Day.’
As I have been sober longer it rings so true. If we want to be sober entering 2024 it’s important to remember that it’s our own responsibility to edify our own sobriety over the Holidays.
Some of the self imposed pressures of the Holidays, all of the alcohol floating around and presence of what can be toxic or enabling family members can make the Holidays tough. Your own sobriety is worth a lot more than any of those things though. The people who tempt you to drink typically won’t be the ones who have deal with the consequences of a relapse of you start drinking again.
Remember you are under no obligation to attend party or event if you feel your sobriety is threatened. You do not have to fear turning down a drink. If someone takes offense to that I have found that looking them dead straight in the eye and saying ‘I don’t drink’ with confidence typically causes the other person to back down.
There is no reason anyone who has this app should relapse over the next three weeks if they seek outside support here when they feel tempted… It’s not worth it. Alcohol is not the doorway to anything good for us and neither are people who would enable us to jeopardize our own sobriety…
It can be difficult time of year for some…I know it’s been difficult for me in the past. I’ve had some wasted Christmas’s down the years. Last year I had a sober Xmas and I can tell you it bwas something magical. I remember being up early on St Stephens morning, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse and I was fresh, happy and looking forward to the few days ahead. It was fantastic and I didn’t feel too hard done by “missing out” on the copious amounts of liquor I would have drank in previous years.
There will be challenges this year for all of us. But we must maintain and keep the promise we made to ourselves. Use your tools and systems, it too shall pass and enjoy this special time.
This will be second Christmas sober. Last year I tried to still go out and have a soft drink or fake beer. This year I aint bothered. It’s not been the temptation to drink but the inability to be around drunk people. There annoying.
I know what you mean. I met up with a few mates a couple of months ago, we try and get together 2-3 times a year. Anyway, our lift there and back cancelled so I seriously considered not going (if I can’t have a drink what’s the point) I ended up driving, drinking soft drinks all day and driving back. After a couple of hours when everyone was very merry it slowly dawned on me how boring drunks are when you’re sober. Repeating themselves, slurring, talking general b*llocks, oh did I mention repeating themselves?
Yep, full agreement, drunks are annoying
It’s well past midnight on Christmas day heading into St Stephens morning and I’m happy to be past the danger zone so to speak. I’ll enjoy a sober Christmas this year, it’s in the bank now. Christmas Eve and day would be the ones to trip me yup but I managed quite well and I’m thankful for tha.
I recalled previous years when I would have been a mess for 4 or 5 days and weighed up the pro’s and cons. Thankfully I came through on the right side.
I did have a few niggles whispering to me that I could enjoy a few beers on like the 27th or 28th as a little reward or since all the formal festivities would be over. Sneaky little play from the beast but I caught it in time and shut it down thankfully.
I’m going to check back in here everyday until I return to work on the 2nd.
Xmas was tough for me this year, I felt very stressed all day and lonesome even with so many people around me. it’s hard being a single mama without the traditional nuclear family structure i grew up with - I think I was missing that, something that’s not my reality. no partner to share the holiday with. and of course my boy gets all the attention and i’m just … there. mama never gets no shine, no appreciation. i can deal with that though, i appreciate myself. i appreciate myself for being sober. that is awesome. i can give myself what i don’t get from others. that’s fine.
but tonight was even harder, because people were drunk. i was with my dad’s girlfriend’s family and her mother was wasted - she has dementia and drinks a bottle of wine a day. it was sickening to see her like that. her other daughter’s husband had mentioned earlier that he had been going to AA, but he kicked back several glasses of vodka and — uuggghhh so depressing. i don’t know what my dad was on but he was irritating. i don’t feel safe when people aren’t sober, they’re not themselves and it’s just like - what are we doing here? why can’t we be present? life is important. family is important. being present is important and nobody was truly present because they were all under the influence. it’s sad.
i’m really grateful to be sober (106 days!!) - i just wish everyone else could be sober too anyway we made it through and i will be waking up hangover-free tomorrow so for that, i am thankful. i am thankful to be a sober mother for my son - he will never feel unsafe around me, because I am and will continue to be truly present. life is too precious and short not to be.
Today was a tough one for me! I started feeling lonely (even though i had a family celebration last night and nuclear family today). The mental obsessions began. Fortunately, I’m on Antabuse & it provided an additional safety guard. I couldnt just drink to rid myself of the lonely & blue feelings this year.
I ended up going to town to accomplish whatever errands i could with most stores being closed for Christmas. I also listened to Brene Brown’s “the gifts of imperfection,” and made french onion soup (i used extra beef broth instead of alcohol for deglazing).
I’m grateful for this sober community . It is extremely comforting knowing that i was not alone in my struggle today, & I’m uplifted by those who have the courage to share.
You have claimed the right to love yourself. I have been inspired by your journey these past 106 days, it is uplifting to watch someone fight for her sobriety and win! I appreciate your openness and how plugged in you are to your feelings.
I opened my eyes, I was alive and surrounded by family and the smile of my son on Christmas morning, opening the gifts I bought him, because I didn’t waste it on alcohol or weed. When my son said “Mom, this is the best Christmas ever”, tears weld in my eyes because I felt his joy and happiness. I accomplished and conquered.
The greatest gift was 15 months of sobriety, on Jesus Christ birthday. I celebrated by praising his name and I was sober.
The promises came into affect for me. I was focused, clear-minded, and serene. I was blessed, grateful and humble. Most appreciative for the gifts and will cherish it throughout the New Year.
Christmas is everyday. We give with our love and receive with our hearts.
This is my 2nd year sober! The first was rough, but I was tough. I didn’t know what I know now. The Higher Power and the spirituality. That’s what I gathered this year. Happy New Year everyone. Be blessed and sober
Spent the holidays sober! Only on day 4, but I got through it! It was defintely tough at times but I was in the present and not so messed up where I didnt remember the day. It felt more magical this year and was more enjoyable. I am very blessed. Hope everyone had a merry christmas!
Still here still sober. 27th is a strange one. It’s no man’s land. In the past I would probably be still on it but showing major fatigue. Family would be well fatigued with me also. Christmas life is so much easier, cleaner, more memorable without the beers. I just need to fight the battle here and there when the craving comes calling. It’s not easy as I know it’s not for a lot of people but it is worth it.
It’s a difficult time for all. I’ve had a sober Xmas. My third although I have drank in between. I’m committed to being sober during Christmas because I’ve ruined so many in the past. Usually drinking from the 24th straight through to when the wheels come off or something pulls me out of it sometime around the 29th.
I’ve enjoyed this one but I know others have not. If you’re in a rough spot let me share a little tip with you.
Open a note on your phone. Write how you are feeling now warts and all and keep adding to it over the next few days and see where it takes you. I did this and it really helps. Look forward and back at the last few days, I know it’s not how you planned Xmas but there were good parts, all is not lost.
I’ve been in the horrors at this time in the past dreading NYE and the thought of returning too normal life with the knowledge that I didn’t get what I’d hoped from Christmas, in fact the opposite. But what happened, happened. Try to eat, drink some water take a walk. Apologize to people if you need to. Just get yourself through these few days and things will look a lot brighter next week.
Just some ramblings from someone who’s been there.
Stay safe, be kind to yourself and try sleep tonight.
I think holidays are the toughest for me as well. I’ve got 1,033 days sober and while I feel great about that and am confident I’m ok to make it through the holidays, it’s the company I sometimes have to keep during this time of the year. Family that either isn’t supportive or is completely wrecked for the entire week of Christmas and New Years. I don’t want to be that guy that doesn’t show up anymore, especially since it is my wife’s family, but it’s hard being pretty much the only sober person at these events. So I slog through with a modest amount of anxiety simply hoping to get it all over with. It’s not easy but it can be done.
Still here and still sober. Few little bits and pieces to work through today but I was never in any real danger of slipping. But I did get to put some systems into action. NYE next up but again I shouldn’t faulter at that stage. I’ve taken this whole late December as a block and Nye is the last 2 days of it. I’m not falling at the last hurdle.
I don’t want to say I survived this period for 2 reasons. 1 if I call it job done the guard will drop and I may even give myself a reason to “celebrate” or a reward, which could be 6 cans of beer. 2 I don’t want to call it surviving, it makes it sound like I had to fight my way through it, almost give it some negativity which it shouldn’t be. It was a positive, fun filled, relaxing time with my family not a battle for survival. Anyway, over and out for today. I’ll check in here again tomorrow and if anyone is in a jam, just work through the few minutes/hours whatever on a positive vibe if you can not a survival footing. Am I making sense or just spilling my thoughts out? Anyway here’s to another 24 in the bank
anyway we made it through and i will be waking up hangover-free tomorrow so for that, i am thankful. i am thankful to be a sober mother for my son - he will never feel unsafe around me, because I am and will continue to be truly present. life is too precious and short not to be. 
good on you man! That’s awesome
. It is extremely comforting knowing that i was not alone in my struggle today, & I’m uplifted by those who have the courage to share.
