Swapping one addiction for another?

Ok I’m reaching out today as problems have started to rise in my recovery I’m feeling so I overwhelmed,it not so much that I want to use that’s not the issue…I feel I have a handle on this but every other aspect of my life ATM seem out of control ,I’m putting on weight and I’m so trying not to so that’s defeating me I’m smoking roll ups i really need to give it up,but the worse one is I’ve been using online gambling sites ,and I’m losing money and chasing my losses all addictive behaviours,so I feel even though I’m not using everything else in my life hasnt changed,I feel I’ve been working really hard for my recovery ,I’m now asking myself if I really have,i do this I overwhelm myself with so much I need to do but end up trying to do all of it and none of it gets done if that makes sense

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This is my next step it all make sense .my head feels like it’s full of a thousand thoughts but I can’t seem to grasp even one of them ,it feel like trying to hold water in my hands …if that makes sense can’t seem to get a grip on my single thing ATM,it’s frustrating

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Sorry to hear you’re struggling right now Emma, what Rain has said is right, if you’ve stopped using but haven’t addressed the issue of ‘why’ you use them it’s more than likely you will continue to self treat the ‘why’ with another addictive behaviour. You need to get to the route of what it is that makes you turn to addictive behaviours and address it, once you have identified the real issue you can start to learn healthy coping mechanisms instead.
Would it be easier for you to take one step at a time, identify the behaviours which are causing you damage right now (gambling) and address this first and then as you learn better coping mechanisms address the rest (smoking and weight gain) bit by bit to make it more manageable, sometimes we can only do so much at once and trying to do it all ends up in us doing nothing at all.
A twelve step programme sounds like a great idea and of course carry on the great work you’re already doing

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Thanks shell,I’m so aware that I need to now address the deeper issues but tbh the past 55 days has been just about getting use to not using ,the gambling has become a noticeable behaviour definitely in the past couple weeks,u know from past attempts to get clean I will exchange my addiction, difference being this time I never made it past 2 weeks and I never wanted it like I wanted it now so that puts me in a better position to move forward to deal with the other aspect of my unmanageable life ,

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I’m busy at work but we are gonna have a chat later just me and you, till then remember the alcohol, pills drugs, sex gambling are not addictive, we have addictive personalities, we are always searching for a high or rush of adrenalin. So we will see what else we can find for you. Till then :heart:

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obviously drugs and alcohol are addictive but you get the point :joy: :joy: :joy: :joy:

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Sounds like you’re right where you need to be Emma, seeing the problem areas and asking all the right questions to stop and stay stopped, just need to find the action that’s right for you x

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Thanks Paul off swimming with Vinnie n cooking a roast each day AHH.xx

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Oh Emma. This has got to be so hard. I’ve seen a lot of lives ruined from gambling.

But hats off to you for bringing it out into the open. For now, set a new clock for the gambling. Keep track of both sobrieties.

You’ll get through this. Thanks for sharing.

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Yeah, I agree with the others. I’m only a few days ahead of you and I’ve recently realized I needed to put more work into my recovery. I totally understand the racing thoughts that you cant seem to get a grip on. I have a lot of free time alone now and I haven’t ever had so many feelings like this. It is overwhelming. So I went to aa to learn about the steps to help me process everything I’m going thru. It has helped calm my mind already. Good for you to reach out and try to fix this issue before it gets out of hand. Keep going lady! You’re doing awesome :purple_heart:

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I agree with others, fill that void with meetings and work the program. I need to practice what I’m preaching and get a sponsor then start the steps. I swapped my DOC with vaping and eating. I’m sure other things will start creeping in, if I don’t do something about it. Hang in there. :two_hearts:

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I’m so glad I shared my struggles it is maki g so much more sense now @Mephistopheles spot on Ty your words couldn’t be truer ,love all the advice and support I’m getting,I’ve come to an understanding that now I’ve got over the putting down part now the proper work begins .

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I have an addictive personality, if anyone does. I deal with this by allowing myself to become obsessed with constructive hobbies. Otherwise I would do the same things you’re doing.

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I also try to harness my obsessions for the forces of Good :stuck_out_tongue: the worst right now is getting stuck in the black hole of internet forums and taking 6 hours to drag myself out. Why is moderation so hard haha

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Moderation is hard. So it’s nice to have activities you can go crazy with.

For me, yoga and meditation are super helpful with that yearning to fill the void, whether it’s by alcohol, drugs, food or whatever. A lot of the root of those impulses can be a refusal to accept being present in the moment. Sometimes we need to learn for the first time how to breathe and be with ourselves. That can be through steps and meetings, or therapy, or anything that works for you. I’m still learning how to not try to run away from the present moment and from myself, and it’s probably a lifelong journey.

So many great ideas ,I get what I’m doing I really do,so now is time to face myself ,me myself and I and not just substitute one addiction for another,onwards forwards I go ,I’ve put down now it’s time to GET HONEST WITH MYSELF.

The moment I realised that the biggest problem was MY addictive behaviour, everything began to make sense. That was the reason why I blasted cocaine as part of my day-to-day life when no one else did, that is why I could not stop drinking when everyone else could.

As soon as I recognised that, I realised I needed to get to grips with the root-cause of my addictive behaviour.

Sure, the alcohol and cocaine were addictive, but I could have equally become addicted to gambling or many other things, so was my frame of mind.

I know I am only saying what others have said, but it is so important to say that getting sober is only half the journey, the other half is dealing with the underlying mental/emotional state that is powering our addictive behaviour.

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I’ve always said, being alcohol free doesn’t make you a better person, but it gets you sober enough to see your flaws.

When I’m drunk I’m the funniest person ever, and the jokes I say aren’t too bad but people have no sense of humor.

When I’m sober, I’m like, oh hell no, I went too far…

You’re sober enough now to see your other flaws, and are sober enough to spend that drinking time fixing them.

Exercise, learn a language, do your taxes, write poems to your loved ones.

You can’t expect to finish the journey just because you took one step

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I’m right there with you. Sure, I’m not drinking anymore (…57 days. hooray for me…whoop dee doo…), but I’ve seen a near-constant parade of additional addictive behaviors march right in behind it. For me it comes back to the hole that my brain was compulsively trying to fill by pouring alcohol into it. That hole is still there (and even bigger than before the alcohol) and until I address that in a healthy way, my brain has shown itself all too capable of manufacturing any number of harmful temporary solutions.

I’m not “working a program,” but in a sense maybe I am because I am now trying to actively watch my actions on a daily basis and monitor for signs of addictive behavior. To me, “addictive behavior” is irrational action often performed in times of stress, anxiety, or boredom. One of the big warning flags I’m seeing lately relates to this app. I find I’m constantly checking it…checking for what? I’m not sure. I’m just compulsively opening this app, glancing at a couple of posts, and then closing it. To me, any irrational behavior that I see myself performing is as important to identify and irradicate as the drinking was, even if it isn’t as immediately harmful.

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