I’m probably on my 2 job/career since being in recovery. And it has been as “normal” as I expected it to be. My first job was fine, they liked me and I liked them, and more importantly they fulfilled their obligations and I kept my end of the bargain. Only when our core values stopped aligning did I choose to “take my talents elsewhere”. There was no doubt in my mind I had to move on, recovery has taught me I don’t have anything to fear. And I have learned the difference between carelessness and bravery. (Of course there is always more to learn). People always told me I sold myself short, in relation to money and time, now I am overly ambitious it seems. I want quality over quantity when it comes to $ and 
. I’d like to use odd jobs to fuel my passion, but what is passion really? To me it’s a good sounding word, but I have never felt it for anything, if I am being honest. If I was forced to choose, I want normalcy but don’t we all! It is true for me that if I’m not moving forward I’m moving backwards. What I do for a living now, could be it, or I can will it to be it, and change my lifestyle to fit it. I know I’m in dangerous territory when Im wax philosophizing and not making a concrete decision. I have no desire to drink or pick up right now so I’m a success right ? Catering my whole life to that single objective and letting the chips fall where they may sounds great but for me it’s not realistic. I’ll use the last quarter of this year to make some tough decisions about what I’m willing to accept, and how I want to live as far as monetarily. I may have to try to live a better lifestyle and live up to the “hype” so to speak. I’m grateful to have the wherewithal and be in a place where the opportunity is available to have that choice. I’m living “the good life” thanks to recovery, but maybe I deserve “the best life” I’m starting to think that’s not to much to ask for.
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