The life of me (Part 1)

Today will be a good day. I’m feeling less sad. Happy my roller coaster is going up the hill. I really like the insight timer, such a great app. I’m trying to look at things in a more positive light. Everything is going back on lockdown in New Mexico but I still have a job and I’m thankful for that.

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Gratitude is a powerful tool. I use it myself when I start feeling down or lost, or when I get a “hamster wheel” thought that just spins around in my head. I start making lists of things I’m grateful for. (If it’s a really tough moment, I’ll do a “gratitude alphabet” where I go A-Z, one thing I’m grateful for, starting with each letter!)

You’ve got this Jenn :+1:

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Today I get to go for a treasure hunt lol not sure why people feel the need to buy all the paper products with each shutdown. Other than that, just another day. Hope everyone is well

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Did you find your treasure? :moneybag: :gem: :face_with_monocle:

I did. Ironically both times a shut down is happening we actually need toilet paper lol I had to go to a different grocery store because they are closing the major ones in our town for 2 weeks. Luckily we have enough stuff to ride it out.

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Glad to hear it Jenn! Happy for you :man_dancing: :smile:

Off work today. Making a new soup and about to start a 90s cartoon theme puzzle.

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puzzle was pretty cool. The hubs joined in (which I didn’t expect). We had a fun time doing it together and talked of getting a more complicated one. Working today

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Your post is so beautiful. I can feel the depth of your honesty and the weight of your transparency with who is most important in your journey : yourself.

Continue to be honest with yourself about what has led you to therapy. Do not run away from your thoughts, let them out. Underneath all those thoughts you may find wounds you didn’t know needed healing. And once they start healing you’ll find what you’re looking for in sobriety - Life my friend. And what a beautiful life you have.

So proud of your journey, please share more. Congrats on 4 days.

  • sending you strength and power :black_heart:
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I don’t have anything to say other than I’m sober. Stay at home/ shut down sucks

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Good for you Jenn, keep it up!

It sucks when life isn’t what we wish it could be. Sometimes it’s not even about wishing. It’s just… sucky.

You’re a good person Jenn and you deserve a safe, sober life where you can be your full self.

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Today I feel grateful. My hubs is off for 3 days and we are going to see his family Wednesday for thanksgiving since we both work Thursday. I’m grateful for my husband for many reasons but I can’t say that without also feeling proud of our journey thus far. We have been together almost a decade. We have rode the wave of drugs, jail (him) and alcohol (me). This year we have bought our own house and moved to a new state. Life is so crazy and for today, for now I am grateful.

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Thank you for always posting such positive comments. I really appreciate it. You’re awesome! Hope you have a great day

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It’s my pleasure Jenn. It’s wonderful to hear about the whole journey you’re going through, difficult times and positive times, all together; it’s a healthy, whole journey & I’m grateful to you for sharing it with us. Thanks! :innocent:

Today was interesting. I woke up angry, like red hot spit fire angry. No idea why. Pissed the hubs off, he had a right I was being a butt. I got a piece of paper and wrote why I felt angry then wrote how to change that issue. There was nothing another person could do to fix my angry and in 2 reasons there was nothing I could do. So I did a breathing thing the counselor told me to do and apologized to the hubby. I feel better this afternoon than I did this morning.

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The emotional roller coaster is normal. After repressing emotions under our addictions for years it’s natural they’ll be all over the place for a while.

Speaking as a husband of a wife who also gets angry at times: he still loves you.

Take care & keep up your recovery work, care for yourself, give yourself space and rest as you need. You’ll be ok :slight_smile:

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Yesterday was good then kinda hard when we got home. So I put up the Christmas tree and did a bit of decorating then went to bed. Also hit 2 weeks yesterday. Happy Thanksgiving :maple_leaf::turkey: everyone!

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Is it ok if I ask what was hard? Did something triggering happen? If you want to share, we’re here. There are hard times, hard days; as our Yoda-Stevie says, victory is facing & defeat in those one at a time.

I think it was just coming back home. Since we are on a stay at home order that was the first time I’ve left the house in almost a week. I went for a run and got some endorphins today.

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