I’m almost 30 days sober from opiates. And the last 4 weeks have been such a crapfest for me physically and emotionally. But the hardest part has been that I feel like a completely different person to who I was during the last 5 years of marriage. When I met my husband I was on Suboxone and have been the whole relationship. I honestly feel like I was just numb emotionally and existed through life. Don’t get me wrong, my husband is an amazing human being but I’m starting to realize we don’t have that much in common and Im worried I stayed because of the stability he had given me in my life when I needed it. Financially and because I was a single parent he gave me parenting stability. I know I am still in the beginning stages of sobriety but there is a certain amount of clarity that comes with it and I think I need to sit down and have a discussion with him about it. He has a habit of getting really worked up and defensive any time I bring up my feelings and that’s another reason I haven’t been able to have a discussion with him. Sorry just wanted to put down my feelings and see if it offered any more clarity. I hate feeling all these feelings but happiness is the goal and right now I can’t see myself happy in this relationship but like all things in sobriety I want to wait and see if this feeling is temporary.
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Hold fire- don’t make any rash decisions.
You’re 30 days sober (which is an amazing achievement btw)
Give it time, once you’ve got some time under your belt then make the jump if needed.
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I do use I statements. I learned that a very long time ago when dealing with my narcissist father and codependent mother. Yea thanks for the advice though. I was actually thinking about getting a journal for that very reason to help keep track of my feelings. I’ll wait it out and see what happens.
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