I’m really ashamed and sad to say I had to reset my timer today after over a month of sobriety. I feel like I have let myself down and can’t believe I am here again. I’ve lost count of how many times. I know all too well the lonely feeling of starting again and just wanted to reach out and maybe ask people of their experiences with relapse and how everyone stays kind to themselves while starting again.
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Don’t beat yourself up and just get right back to it. I relapsed so many times there were moments I felt like I would never string together meaningful sober time. Just keep trying, try everything you can, get help from AA, therapy, rehab, meditation exercise, reading, basically do whatever you can and don’t give up. It is so worth it. 
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I was resetting my timer every single morning for a while. I couldn’t even get a day! AA is really helping me. I’m working the 12 step program. I cannot do it on my own. Tried for years. Today is a new day. Check out a meeting and connect with someone. It really helps to be with people like ourselves. They get it!
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I went 188 days and then reset, after many more resets I’m back to 29 days. You’ve got to see it as learning, no use being angry with yourself, this is difficult, alcohol is everywhere! Be proud of yourself, those days sober are yours to keep. Onwards and upwards!
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The fist time I started to quit I had 2 relapses, both after 3 months sober. Then I was sober for 5 years. Hoped I was cured then and took my first drink at my birthday. Hoped to be a "normal"drinker again. Not! It worked for a few months (with a spinning head) but soon I was drinking my old amounts of wine.
I hated it! So I quit again, but relapsed after 3 weeks. Got here on this app and quit again.
Being sober since! Within a few days I’m 1 year sober.
So don’t be to hard for yourself. But don’t be to kind either 
A relapse can happen, but it doesn’t have to. I think the more you relapse, the harder it is to get sober. But try to learn from your relapse so you can avoid the next one. What made you drink/use? What can you do to make it stick this time? Have you give it all you have? Tried all?
Just think it all trough, it will make you stronger 
Glad you still here, let’s make this work!!
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Like everyone mentioned @Mooije … we all stumble and fall… but it’s how fast we get up that matters. You got this!
T’y for sharing @SoberWalker, amazing example of determination
#sobrietyrocks 
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I’ve reset my timer it seems a dozen times. But I noticed I get a little further clean time between the resets. I feel like I’m getting stronger because I realize more and more how much I hate the drug after a relapse. I try not to have self pity because after all its a decision you make. I’m also learning my triggers and one of them is stress. If in a situation I can’t control or correct I tend to use addict behavior to cope with it. I know I’m getting better though. I’m growing, but slowly.
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I always left the door open to the possibility of a drink. And so I developed no true sobriety. I did get semi-good at staying dry for a while, once about 9 months, but usually weeks or days.
When I was done with drinking and believed I could get and stay sober, I did everything I knew to do, even the things I didn’t want to do, and made it my #1 job to go to bed sober each night no matter what. I used Antabuse and counseling and AA. I stopped driving without a license and asked for help with rides. I did what the people in AA suggested, because they had years of sobriety and I was counting days.
Now I have become an old timer. And I start each day with a short prayer and a bit of meditation. I go to 3-5 AA meetings per week. I call my AA sponsor regularly, though less frequently than I think maybe I should. I don’t drink no matter what. I am at ease being alone and being with others. My life is lived today, not struggled through or a battle ground.
I an grateful to be alive today. I am grateful for the chance to experience the lives of others as they share with me. @Mooije, blessings on your house .
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I just reset after a similar time. Feeling pretty fucked up about it all too, teary and depressed. I hope you manage to get back on the horse. It’s the only thing we can do I think.
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@Mooije
I went a solid 21 days recently and went to the bar to watch football. Needless to say I over drank and woke up monday feeling like i would die. I continued to be sick forna few days afterwards. I convinced myself that I could just have a few during the game. Well, around 14 beers and a few shots later there I was, drunk. Dont feel bad friend. Use this as a learning experience. Thats what I did! Now I have 7 days sober!
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Hi I have reset my timer too. I’m struggling to stay stopped. Hopefully with this on my phone it will help as I know there are people who have been in the same situation.
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Like what you say about it’s a journey not a destination
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@Jim78 It’s so true. Thank you for that perspective. There’s something so demoralizing about starting again when the focus could be on what was achieved! Thank you again your words really helped me.
@Kipper I totally relate to feeling teary and depressed. Are you ok? I’m just trying desperately to keep myself distracted and remember how much better I felt during that month: that it’s something I can do because I have done it. I still feel like shit though.
Hey @Cazz you are definitely not alone. How Are you going?
Totally agree with day counting being a curse as well as a blessing. I really love you take on this!
Thanks @SoberWalker allowing myself one night always turns into a circle of horror and pain that can last for months. This time it lasted a little under a week and was starkly contrasted by how good I had felt in my sober month. I really appreciate what you say about not being too kind to myself. I think being more active on this app is the first thing I can do. And I will talk to my therapist about what may have triggered it.
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You haven’t reset, you’ve just restarted.
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Not good. I keep picking up. Still going to AA. Even though I only take money for the pot, I’ll go home get my purse and go and get my booze. A quote came up on my phone this morning, believe you can then your half way there.
I started again and again non countable times. You just keep trying and don’t give up! For me it is everything about mindset. Everything is in our head, even drinking. We all are different so what works for me doesn’t need to work for you. I am just trying every time different way until I will find the one which will keep me away from alcohol… 
E.g. I had to find another things to do instead of drinking. And I started to appreciate how I feel without alcohol. I am reminding to myself every day how nice it is to be sober without depression or hungover. After every activity I do I remind to myself that I wouldn’t be able to do it if I was drinking the night before.
I often remind myself how awful I felt when I drank and what I love in my new life.
I started look at myself like at inspiration. I am not taking my alcoholism like a weakness anymore. I am strong being able to try to go over it and I have got a chance to start again and get better life! I am very happy and blessed
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