So mad at myself for relapsingā¦again. I really felt good about it this time. I NEED to do this. I WANT to do this. But itās like something switches over in my brain and all of my plans for what Iām going to do if I want a drink fade away. Iām so tired of crying and feeling like a complete failure.
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Oh love Iām so sorry to hear that. I know how hard that is. I hear how frustrated and disappointed you are. It is a hard, hard place.
You are not alone. Many people here have struggled in the same way. It is possible to overcome this. Keep coming here, keep reading; you will learn so much! What helps many people, especially in early recovery, is recovery groups: having that community where everyone is working to develop their āsober strengthā - that helps you feel less alone. Have you tried a group before? There are a lot of options:
Resources for our recovery
You have to explore and find something that works for you. But one thing thatās important is to change up your routines. Change your commute if you need to not pass your liquor store; substitute Perrier with lime instead of beer (lots of people here have fallen in love with tea - having a hot herbal tea ritual at the end of the day); really care for yourself: I started taking baths at the end of the day, before bed - I looked forward to it.
You have spent years growing a set of habits and āreward pathwaysā in your brain. Thereās a neurological and psychological reason for whatās happening. You can change it though. Work a system, develop new routines, connect with other people in recovery - and you will recover. I promise.
You can do this love. You are a good person who belongs, you matter, and you deserve a safe, sober life where you can be your full self. Never, ever give up. Never, ever stop trying. You can do this. You absolutely can. 
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Hey,I feel your frustration and disappointment,but please donāt stay there for too long ,try again and again and again whatever it takes right,most important thing o thi k when on the early stages of recovery is a fantastic network of similar minded ppl so your definitely in the right place alot of us need more than just a great forum to help us in that rd and staying on it in recovery have you looked into 121 support smart recovery which you can do from home in a book you order they also do online meetings ATM AA is another great tool also drs or local alcohol services there so so much support out there you just need to look for it,keep trying it will click at some point .
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Hey 
today is my day 1ā¦ again 
I am literally in you exact same boat. I feel like shit. I drank a lot last night, I scared my fiance, I scared myself, and Iām sick and tired of doing this all the time. I want this so badly to be sober but its like a switch goes off in my head and I sabotage everything. All I can say is please donāt give up. Give it another try. This is like my 30th time trying this again and it sucks but when I come on here and see how happy these people are finally feeling good and looking good it helps remind me that thats what I want for myself. I want to be better. So even though we hate trying again and again it shows strength and we canāt be hard on ourselves about it addiction is a hard thing to kick. Take small steps forward and think in terms of one day, or even hours. Try not to feel overwhelmed and try to not feel disappointed or discouraged about starting over because itās all apart of the process. We can do this 
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What happens when you decide to drink?
Like do you think it will be different This time?
Or maybe you just decide
āfuck it? I know this will end badly, but I donāt careā.
Getting to the answers of questions like these can help with a solution.
Meetings help too. Might think they arenāt for you like most of us thought. But they help
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Good Lord I could have written that!!! I hear your frustration and angst. It is a rough spot to be in and I am sorry for that. Please know you CAN do this. Keep trying, never give up trying to find what works for you. I know you may feel defeated and hopeless, I know I did for a very long timeā¦I also know that you CAN work through thisā¦you CAN find what helps you sustain long term sobriety. All the smaller starts and stopsā¦these can be building blocks and times to learn what does and does not work for you.
I am so glad you are still here fighting the good fight. We CAN do hard things! Especially together with support and community.
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Youāve got this. Itās not about how many times you mess up-- itās about getting back up with a more positive mindset. You are worthy and enough to do this!!!
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Hello just wanted to say that you havenāt failed at anything. You attempted to stop but it didnāt happen for you this time. Shit there is people that donāt even try to stop they just continue drinking like if they donāt have a problem even tho they know they do, dust yourself off and do it again. Remember one thing in life,life is not perfect, you have your good days, bad days, days in the middle a mix of bad or good. Itās how you pick your self up when you fall down that defines who you really are, so go ahead cowgirl pick yourself up and show the addiction whoās boss. Take care
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Iāve had many day 1āsā¦but keep trying!! Iāve finally had a day 1 stick:ā¦and you will too!! Iāve just passed 3 weeks which I have NEVER done before and it feels amazing. Iām feeling really strong and so determined. The sober life is so much better!! I actually have money left at the end of the week! Crazy 
feel free to message me if you need xx
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Thank you all for the support! Today is a new day and Iām ready to work for what I know I need.
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Good for you! Yes it is, every day. Keep with it - and never give up.
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Good for you Anna thatās awesome! Iām so happy for you 
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I relapsed yesterday too. I had 2 1/2 Truly drinks. But I did throw half of my last drink away and I feel really good for doing that. I told my husband this morning that I really didnāt want to drink with him but he had asked me to join him for a cocktail. The problem was I hadnāt told him that I was not drinking so I made a point to tell him this morning and he was very supportive! Yesterday was just a bump in the road. Iām excited to move on in this journey!!!
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Good for you! Taking that first step and owning your sobriety is powerful. You are showing so much courage - keep it up!
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I think we all know that feeling. I certainly do. It was reflected and amplified in the eyes of my wife, which had gone from anger to resigned sadness.
But I kept trying, until one day it stuck. It will stick to you, if you keep trying. So keep trying. Try different things, and be willing to try everything. Meetings, sponsors, outpatient, inpatient. Whatever it takes, keep trying until it sticks.
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Iām right there with you. Iām so tired of failing and feeling like a failure. And it never makes sense bc everytime I relapse itās never āworth itāā¦ If anything, I think āoh ya. THIS is why I hate drinkingā¦ā I hope we both beat this 
Day 2 (again) for me today.
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my late sponsor used to say if you put your hand in the fire why would you do it again to see if its different this time ? im fortunate never wanted to put my hand in the fire , wish you well
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