I have been drinking heavily daily for over a year. A year ago, I asked my then husband for a divorce due to his drinking and abusive behavior. I drank to numb the pain of it all. I drank to hide from the world. It made me feel invisible. All I wanted to do was crawl into a dark hole and never come out.
I blamed myself for not trying harder “even though I tried everything “ to save our marriage.
7 months after the divorce, I reconnected with an old friend. We started dating and have been together ow for 9 months. We drink socially or have a daily beer after work. But, lately it keeps increasing. It’s causing issues in our relationship and now he wants to call it quits. I’m devastated obviously after putting in so much trust and effort only to be hurt again.
This constant feeling of not being good enough is a definite trigger for me. I wasn’t enough for my ex husband to want to change and now I’m not enough for the new guy to change either. I feel useless and worthless at this point.
Any ideas on how I can occupy my time when I feel like drinking?
I have been sober for 7 days now and I fill my time with reading, alot of walking, chores/house improvements and gym time when I’m not at work. I also listen to a lot of podcast that discuss all the benefits of being sober which gives me motivation to keep going. I would use drinking as a crutch for my anxiety. I’m taking medicine for the anxiety now so my urge to drink has significantly decreased. Hope that helps!
Welcome to Talking Sober. Getting sober takes work, probably more work than drinking did. There are so many ways to get sober, and so much experience here with successful sobriety. Take a look at this thread for a starter:
First of all, welcome to this community! I’m on day 12 today and feeling very motivated. Any addiction, including alcohol, fuels that sense of never being enough, and we often turn to other people to fill the void. I know exactly what you’re talking about, and I feel for you.
I’m new here and without a significant other. I’m also currently living with my father in a small town where I hardly know anyone and where drugs and alcohol are the usual way to go out. Instead of feeling alone, I check in on this platform every day and talk to people like you to share my experience, to encourage, and to be encouraged by yours.
Together, in unity, we can achieve a life of happiness and wholeness without feeling inadequate, one where we have so much to give to those who need it most.
Stay connected, keep sharing, and the path will unfold before you. Being alone is not a curse; sometimes it is a blessing in disguise…