Hahaha you seriously made my day!! Thank you!! … 
Snippity snip!!!
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Lol YAY!!! I was just getting ready to write you and say it was just my opinion and that it might of come out harsh lol but I’m glad you’re feeling it too my friend go YOU!!! 
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The reason why you would just delete them and block them out is to avoid a possible feeling or confrontation, remember the scenario we create in our mind is never as bad as reality.
Communication is heavily important to me, the good and bad.
I would rather talk it out. My sons been excluded from parties and gatherings and I don’t take it personally. Stuff happens.
I have been excluded from things and again I don’t take it personally, I actually use it to focus on myself and self care.
By running on impulse and adrenaline you risk the chance of missing out on feelings and emotions that you are somewhat suppressing.
My favourite quote that I think about a lot is “You cannot love another, until you love yourself”
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Yes!!! This was me too. I’ve been sober now 420 days but am finding that with more sobriety, I have increasingly more self protective feelings. Recently, in interacting with people who have crossed boundaries I’ve established since getting sober, I am finding I want to drink to escape. So, for now, I am moving away from people more than I have in the past. I want to stay sober and watch myself get a better handle on my reactions to these people so I can effectively decide and evaluate if, and how, I want them in my life.
That said and as @Rockstar24777 said, “I’m holding all people that come into my space at extremely high expectations.” I would add, I’ve worked really hard to get here and I want to see myself take care of myself by having people in my life that genuinely value me.
Thank you for your post.
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@Clarity congrats on 622. Nice open sharing happening here, in my experience that helps alot. I have struggled with maintaining relationships. Early in my recovery I attempted to do what was suggested and lose peoples numbers and put up boundaries to protect myself. I have noticed I push people away when things get hard for a couple reasons. One abandonment issues and two, I almost always felt pretty confident I could make new relationships, such ego. Now trying to maintain healthy relationships seems foreign even with help, from CBT, sponsor, cousellors yada yada … more relationships… Lol … I’m trying to stop and think rather than react, easier said than done though. Good luck and God bless.
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Aww, what a great response. Yeah, it’s completely new territory to figure out who we want in our lives and have boundaries and figure out where the boundaries even are and how to react! You totally understand! I really loved what you said about having people in our lives who value us, that is so important. I don’t think I really conceptualized that until now.
I think my take away from all this is to take more time to really figure out my reactions, if any, and when in doubt get a second or third opinion! But that it’s also okay to let go of certain people who don’t make me feel valued or just make me feel like shit over and over again. And also probably some therapy wouldn’t hurt.
@I.cant.We.can Good to see you! 
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I’ll walk the path with you. I’ve learned a lot here and really appreciate your putting this out there. 
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Hi its 4 in the morning here im 2 months sober and can relate to you ,i also blocked my brother then unblocked him lol my head its all over the place ,im 48 and ive got issues from my childhood i dont even want to think about i never addressed them just ran away from it all ,i actually feel like i need to see a therapist to spill my guts someone who will not judge me but listen ,i think aa has made me examine my life and everything thats ever happened to me and everything stems from this trauma ive been hiding from ,my mindset has completely changed im more confident more out spoken but also more afraid of rejection if that makes sense, i think that why im they way i am now ,to protect myself, as in if i dont care you cant hurt me ,i think i need help ,but i dont know how to go about getting it ,ive thought about spilling everything out to someone i met from aa shes 25 yrs sober and has been a friend, but is she really, i dont know, hope this makes sense
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So nice to meet you! I think you have a really, really, good point here. When we are in recovery, we all have these past trauma’s we still haven’t dealt with for years. Certain people or situations can sometimes trigger us and cause us to react in ways that surprise us because a lot of it is a build up of things we have been running from for years. You are very smart to notice this…
I have been thinking a lot about therapy too! I think it’s a great idea to start unpacking it all and figuring these feelings out. Doing it on my own isn’t getting me anywhere, its just obviously making me question myself so much. One of the joys of sobriety is that it’s a never ending journey of self discovery. Just when you feel like you have it figured out you peel back another layer.!
I’ve been browsing the DBT thread @Its_me_Stella posted and WOW!!… it’s really really good stuff!! I’m excited to start branching out and try new things. Also, congrats on your 60 days!! 
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I second this. People have to earn a position in my life if they want to stay there. I am not talking about anything unreasonable. I’m a bit of a loner myself and I struggle with participating in relationships or friendships in general. With that said, if I feel as though I’m being mistreated, or being treated like a chore or burdensome and you’re creating excuses for simple things such as making time to see each other…ehhhh I can catch a hint. I’ll do the heavy lifting for you. BYEEEE 
I’ve worked so hard to love myself more and treat myself better and with that comes a sense of self worth. If I am not picking up that same level of respect from the people I allow in my life, they can go. Plain and simple.
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Absolutely 
well said!!!
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I want to say so much, but being on a cell and also not feeling well limits me.
We all want to feel special to family and friends. If you’re not getting that, there is nothing wrong with walking away. Just be sure to process the hurt and cut people off out of self respect, and not lashing out from pain while you try to bury the hurt.
You are worth having love, kindness, and respect from those you give it to.
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